Ferrerman shovels it!

We finally got the shovel-ready snow that Obama promised! Bitch McConnell and the Boner guy tried to stall it in Congress but, the president did an end-around on them while they were out of session. Ha! Whupped 'em again, Josey!

It wasn't the four to eight inches he had promised though. You ladies know what I'm talking about. A bill starts out strong and then gets watered down via cuts and earmarks as the special interests get fed. We get what we get, after they're done getting theirs. Or, maybe the wind changes.

So, what I'm getting at is, I've got a system for shoveling snow that, interestingly enough, doesn't involve a snow blower. I've only been defeated once in recent memory and been forced to carbon footprint it. My system is to take ten minutes out of my busy life, AS the snow is falling, and get it every inch or two. For most snows this means simply pushing it out of the way while it's light and fluffy or before it gets too deep, wet and heavy. It's not only smart and easy to do it this way, it's heart smart. Once you get to a certain age, no matter how tough and strong you used to like to think you were, cold weather can be tougher and stronger. Snow is nothing to die for.

My system failed last year when the wind was whipping about so fiercely that I couldn't begin to keep up. We got twenty inches that day. I seriously looked at all that snow and contemplated reverting to my old system of letting it go until June. You Floridians know that's the best time to shovel snow. You know- before it gets too hot. I assume that's how they do it.

That day, I was out there with shovel in hand, plotting the deaths of the snow plow drivers who had added insult to injury by adding about four m-effing feet of snow to the driveway apron, when my lovely neighbor, Kate volunteered her snow blower. Kate's a wonderful person year 'round. You know that show on TNT, "Leverage"? She looks like the dark-haired, English gal's prettier sister. YES!

Oh Lord, that helped! But twenty inches of snow is a formidable opponent even with the gas-powered help. I made a mental note to ask Kate's husband, Jack, (who looks like the handsome guy on the Channel Two News, only handsomer- giving equal time to the ladies here, NOT being gay!) to purchase a self-propelled model for future freak storms.  But, you know, that's asking a lot. I wouldn't even ask the less attractive neighbors that.

TWO HOURS later, it was finally a fait accompli! In American words, it was done.

I like my system better and it works 99% of the time. Perhaps in a previous life I was Amish. But, the snow needed killing that day and I needed heavy artillery.

And good neighbors.