Sunday, June 30, 2013

Another death in Topixtown...

Well, I guess. I think this one might be real but, with the sad saga of ArtGal still in recent memory, ya gotta wonder.

The man's screen name was Skipper and he was a long time poster. I don't know if I ever posted with him or not but, he was one of the first PM's I ever received when Topix started up that seemingly good feature. I'm only going from memory here because PM's are auto-deleted after 30 days and this was a couple of years ago but, the gist of his message was that I should keep up the good work but watch myself on the politics because people would turn on me. Something like that. Very short and to the point.

Well, I already knew that! People like Dork and Missing Goldfish were telling me to "go back to being funny..." and to leave the politics- and their better, teabagging friends- alone. It was different coming from Skipper because I didn't *know* him so, he had no agenda beyond "you make me laugh/be careful". I did appreciate it then and still do. It was far more genuine, in an impersonal sort of way.

So, I did not know the man or even read him much. I certainly didn't know anything about his personal, real world life. I know I'm fine with that and I bet he would be too.

Of course I learned about his death in a thread. That's the way things work in Topixtown. I think eventually someone who actually knew him in real life, confirmed the death but, opted to not provide anymore info beyond that. This got the usual suspects in gear! Surely ol' Skip would want folks in his imaginary world scouring his real world for facts about him! Usual Suspect Bex scoured the Georgia obituaries for real world news of his passing. Isn't that special? He gets the same inquiring minds commitment in death that a Ferrerman gets in life! Well- for different reasons, of course.  I mean they liked him. But, those enquiring minds have to know...

They can't leave someone they hate alone in life. They can't leave someone they like alone, in death. Sheesh.

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Sweeps Week?

This is very unscientific but, I've never seen the numbers so high for the "now viewing" accounting of the Offbeat Forum.

It's usually a fairly consistent five hundred some very odd people. This would mean a dozen or so regular posters and their socks and four or five people just passing by.

Lately though you could double that number! In the mornings I have seen the count as high as 1200. I check in at lunch and it would be 600 to 700. Perhaps a hundred more at dinner. The odd thing though is there seems to be no corresponding increase in posting. Granted, it is not broken down that way but, there are no hot, fast moving threads creating interest in the forum. There is nothing new or exciting that would attract more posters now than in weeks, months or years past. So, why all the new viewers and why are they lurking instead of posting?

Were they waiting for Ferrerman to leave? I can't help but notice that the count increased when I left...

I'd be lying if I said that hurt. It doesn't make any sense either. You don't drive away one brilliant, provocative poster and double your readership the next day.

Well, maybe in Topixtown you do...

Most of life these days is the business of quantity instead of quality. Topix butters its stale buns with that quantity via nasty little forums all over the world. all adds up. People tuning in each day to post stupid things to Ferrerman in hopes that he'll respond was one way of drumming up business. But, with Ferrer no longer posting and people long-since tired of the non-existent Clique and their bullshit and there being no way on God's green earth to improve might as well fudge the numbers a bit. Why the hell not? Makes far more sense than the old business plan of letting *Sam* run it further into the ground.

Can you insure a message board and then have it accidentally catch fire?

Thursday, June 27, 2013

They troll for thee...

People often speculate about paid posters on Topix. Well, if you know anything about business, you know that actually paying people is the hardest thing some people might ever do in life. The republican party is working night and day (and- ironically-  getting well-paid for it) to alleviate this spending problem that burdens our finest citizens. Being fiscally conservative means never having to bother with a payroll. But, I digress...

Something like 28 people work at Topix dot com.. That's not a lot for a big internet enterprise. I'm pretty sure that 21 of them aren't moderators paid to answer complaints via email with: "Well, YOU started it!". 

If they are paying those assholes like Facebook pays their censors, $1 an hour, they're paying one dollar an hour too much. That's true, by the way, about Facebook. They are far bigger than Topix could ever be and they get third world people to review content for that Nigerian princely sum so, why should Topix pay better than that?

I think Topix mods are posters who are rewarded with the position for showing a certain aptitude for the work. In Nazi Germany, since there was a guard shortage due to the fact that Hitler was fighting with pretty much everyone in the world, concentration camp prisoners who showed a certain skill set were made guards of sorts over the other inmates. These assholes were called "kapos". Though undesirable Jews, Poles or whoever's themselves, they just had a certain psychotic way about them that set them apart from the others. The reward? A little bit more food, the opportunity to live longer than the others and, of course, you got to kick people in the nuts pretty much anytime you felt like it.

So, in other words, I think Topix is fiscally conservative and in touch with the ways and means of human nature. By that I mean, cheap!

For a long time now I have wondered why I've never been banned. The Terms Of Service is so watered down these days that I think Topix long ago laid off the guy whose job it was, was to pee on the TOS and tell people it was raining. So, I must have violated the TOS at some point. I think the mod told me the other day that I had- like 11 times? And that was probably back when there was a TOS to violate. Now they just tell you to TRY and be nice. Just try! See how far that gets ya... Other posters complain (and by complain I mean boast) that they have lost X number of profiles and I have never lost mine. It's a slap on the wrist. If your profile Booger Nose Joe gets *banned*, you get yourself a new email address and create a new stupid name or put a space in the old one (i.e. Booger_Nose Joe) and five minutes later you are back on Topix annoying people. I don't know why they bother banning anyone..

Well, I think someone who actually draws a paycheck from Topix is just smart enough to know that, if you fire Ferrerman, he's out of here. I've been unable to post for short periods and what I didn't do was apply for a new profile. I think Topix picked up on this and realized they had a renegade on their hands  that wasn't going to play the game by their stupid rules. Uh oh...

Maybe the reality is, I'm a made Ferrerman. If you wanna whack a made Ferrerman, you gotta ask permission. If you don't get it, YOU might get whacked...

Obviously, I'm a poster that people love to hate and maybe hate to love. This is all pretty transparent stuff. I get talked about when I'm not posting so that I will post. I get trolled in the hopes that I'll fight back and post more. I get polls made about me in the hopes that I'll post in my defense...See the pattern?  Do whatever it takes to get Ferrerman to post. Mind you, it's not just me. They do this with thousands other people every day. The trolls hardly ever really want you to stop posting or kill yourself. No, they need you to validate their own sorry existence like a junkie needs the heroin. Topix is on the needle.

Topix knows this and counts on it. I learned a long time ago not to stand and fight with these trolls because, you can't actually beat them like in a street fight and they won't go away no matter how badly you zing them. They are attention whores whether Topix would pay them to be or not. Could you imagine the highlight of your day being getting Ferrerman to respond to you by accusing him of being gay with another poster or with the President of the United States? I've ignored a few thousand posts like that. They still try...

And Topix counts on that. The more people harassing Ferrerman, the merrier. Advertisers on Topix don't know that one person may have 100 socks. With the kind of advertisers Topix gets, I don't think they care. They care about clicks that add up to revenue. If get those clicks...then that is fine with them. If a whole group of people is fighting with Ferrernan and others, business is good. You have to reward those who troll for thee in some fashion though so, maybe make one a mod or simply let those who troll for thee run around freely. A little anarchy goes along way as long as someone remains in control.  It's like the GOP letting teabaggers talk about small government. On the surface it seems like they are screwing themselves out of a job but, that's on the surface. Beneath it all, it's all business as usual.

Topix is a sewer. If your business is giving mentally deranged people a voice and a venue to call other people gay, or fat, or toothless or to post pictures of their children then, whatever floats your yacht. It's working.

"No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public."

H.L. Mencken

Ya know though, I now *know* a few people who, on their deathbed, probably actually would lament: "I wish I had posted on Topix more...maybe I would have won...."

Saturday, June 22, 2013


About  a week or so ago, yours truly had a ton of posts pulled. I don't know why. Hegel wrote the mod to find out why hundreds of my posts were pulled. I did not write the mod because my history with the mods is exceedingly one-sided. I write them and they ignore me. I've complained approximately 100 times about that cocksucker, Sam, posting my real name and the fucking mod never replies or even necessarily removes the offending posts or the punk-ass bitch that made them. When they do remove a post with my real name on it, they use every minute of three business days to get around to doing it. Now, you might say: "Ferrerman, you're pretty hard on those cocksucking mods calling them names and all. Maybe that's why they are so slow to react!" Well, you'd be wrong about that, gentle, dedicated, non-reader. The casting of sexual aspersions came long after I realized that these mods don't exactly represent Ferrerman or we the posters. They represent the trolls that lobby them. Until today, I had never had a mod reply to me. Never. Ever.

Hegel has a good rapport with the mods though. Still, they took her to task wondering how she could know I was offended since she was not me. If Ferrerman was offended, why didn't Ferrerman email them to report that? She told then about my frustration with their service but in a much more professional manner and far, far less graphic. Regardless, the butt-licking mod would not be deterred and insisted that, if Ferrerman wants to know why those posts were removed, Ferrerman would have to write to the nod his own self! So, I did!

Here's the thing: I don't know what mod to send these to. Troll Mod 8 probably intercepted the last report and that's why you didn't get it, whoever the fuck YOU are- I don't know! Now, why would I call her "Troll Mod 8"? Because it's pretty evident she works for the trolls. She has no shame about Kevin or Bex or any # of trolls using her posts (Troll Mod 8) to slam me. She's like a dirty cop- worse than the criminals themselves. Now, assuming you are a *real* mod, why would you or any other mod NOT accept complaints from friends of mine concerning posts about me but, you DO accept complaints from gangs of trolls when they complain about posts that may or may not be about one of them? Seems a bit incongruous and overtly troll friendly, don't you think? Anyway, I hope this found the right mod! I hope there IS a right mod! 

To wit the mod responded: 
Hegel keeps sending in complaints saying you are harassed.   Harassment makes the target feel degraded. 
Since Hegel is not the "target" she can't say if the target was degraded or "harassed' 
If someone can't take the time to send in feedback when they feel they are harassed, then it appears that it's not that 
important to them.

You can look at your 11 warnings and see the type of posts that are unacceptable.  I don't need to point them out for you.  In addition to all the gray posts you make as Crunchy Bacon,  As a matter of fact, we even banned
one of your IP's because you had so many vulgar gray box posts like I banged a girl in West Virginia named Rebekah. Weird but, she made me call her Colleen!  or That last sentence is ironic phrasing brought to you by a LIFETIME MEMBER of the JG Swallows Club. 
or Dave must be your boyfriend. It's sweet that you care, Linda. Do you handle his snake...on plumbing jobs, of course I probably mean?

I really don't have the time to go through your messages to find more.  Maybe you fool others by using a gray box when you make your most vulgar insults but we see it all

Troll Mod 8 had specifically promised to address last week's slew of removed posts and uses three non-vulgar posts from x-number of months ago. Sheesh. And so I replied:

OH! So those hundred or so times gray box Sam posted my real name, I wasn't being "harassed"? Are you sure you know what harassed means? If I say "hello" to Stacked and Proud, how is it that you pull that post? I'm gonna guess that Kevin or Kevin and a few others asked you to. S&P  didn't feel harassed but, you pulled the post at the behest of SOMEONE.  And I only have one IP (that would be this one) so, how is it that you banned "one of my IP's"? Maybe someone gave you the wrong "inside info"? LOL! And assuming you are Troll Mod 8, you didn't address them using your posts about me on your disgraceful TM8 thread, out of context so, I take it you approve. BTW, that cocksucker Sam is Linda the Lonely Widow. If you can't ban that asshole, you're in too deep with them. 

True story about a post to S&P where I said "hey" getting pulled within FIVE MINUTES! She didn't complain but others who may have claimed to feel her pain did and the post was immediately yanked. Hey- maybe I should have posted my real name with it? The post would still be there!

Here's how Hegel replied to the Mod:

"So I see that you think Ferrerman has two IPs? LOL, you really are working blind. What I also find hilarious is that you act as if it's terribly odd or wrong for ME to report posts that are targeting Ferrerman, but you're only too happy to receive and deal with feedback from a particular group of people because THEY'RE upset by his posts?
Remember: He sent in report after report for months when they posted his full name and you guys did nothing, so forgive me for sticking up for the guy when he's decided you've made it a point to do nothing to help him so why bother continuing to ask people who don't care. Blame the victim much?
Your bias was proven long ago so let's just stop pretending otherwise. This latest episode proves it. You sanction cyber-bullying by allowing specific people to carry on while blaming others. Reddit has nothing on Topix LLC.
You didn't show Ferrerman any reason why you took the action you took LAST SATURDAY. Because there was none. Here are the facts:
1) There's a particular mod that took this action.
2) The mod has not shown reason why the action was taken at that particular time (Saturday, June 15, 2013) , but uses older posts that were clearly not against TOS (and are TAME compared to what we've seen others get away with daily) as the reason for deleting pages and pages of posts out of the blue.
3) This particular mod works on Saturday and either was not working or chose not to answer queries related to this incident for a week. Take your pick.
4) One particular Topix poster who's stated a familiarity with this moderator made a show on Friday, June 14, of stating he would not be on Topix ALL weekend but showed up the MINUTE Ferrerman's posts started getting pulled......and then posted on our regular thread to announce it was happening. Kevin (GtarMan) had a proxy slip, but there he was. It's all been recorded, saved, and the screen shots plus mod emails forwarded on.
You do realize this stinks to high heaven, right? I've collected and recorded everything for a reason.
I guess we'll see you next week? I'll leave you with a few posts till next time.
Someone else will be looking for you then too. Believe me;)
That's your special boy. I hope he was worth it."

I could not have said it better myself! 

Friday, June 21, 2013


How many people here in America really- and I mean really- care about all the issues that they claim to care about? Politics is generally a package deal. You pretty much are in for a dollar even if you only put up a dime.

Outside of newsvangelists like Glenn Beck and really hardcore internet trolls, do you know of any truly average American who cares about  abortion, gay marriage and deregulation?

Unless you are in the business of selling this crap like Beck or Limbaugh and a cabal of others, why would you care about the myriad interests that- lets face it- really come down to more dollars for them and corporate America?

Ninety per cent of Americans are in favor of stronger background checks for guns but, that doesn't mean shit to legislators who work for the NRA lobbyists and want to keep their lucrative House and Senate jobs as long as possible. It's no danger to the 2A to strengthen background checks but,  the NRA and gun manufacturers don't want anything that might restrict their trade. That's what it is all about but, they won't argue it that way. They don't want it known that they want criminals armed too because armed criminals are good for their sales to fearful citizens. Take guns out of the hands of criminals, you're left with the rather limited hunting market.

Gay Marriage? How many people really care if Frank and Barney marry? Even people who are religious that you may know, really don't care. I mean really care. I don't think too many politicians really care either. It's funny to hear thrice married Newt Gingrich talk about it endangering the institution of marriage  though. And Lindsay Graham might really just have commitment issues rather than religious objections to gay marriage. Except for things like insurance companies not wanting to pay out survivors benefits, who really cares? It might be just about money but I tend to see it as political smoke and mirrors. Get people thinking about gay marriage instead of what is happening to food and water supplies. Funny thing, people love the movies and TV and Doogie Howser, who grew up to play Barney Stinson on that How I met Your Mother show is gay as all get out, married to a man and a father. People like that show and love him enough that he hosted the latest awards show. How did that happen in an America that is Christian and against gay marriage? You'd think he'd have been stoned to death by now.

Who on your block (that doesn't work for Monsanto or Exxon) really wants less regulation? Who really buys into regulation ruining the business of America? Does regulation thwart business? You're goddamned right it does! Left to their own devices, these people will wink at safety in the face of the deaths of their employees. Someone making them literally pay, makes them pay for safety in the workplace. Otherwise, get out there on that steel, ya fuckin' pussy or go home!

That's the way it was in 1913. Did you know that also in 1913, farmers owned 100% of their corn? Now Monsanto owns worse than 90% of *our* corn. Well, to be fair, they are the ones who put all the effort into chemicals to genetically modify corn and other crops and, of course, chemicals to kill pests and yada yada- that cost money. I don't know if anybody asked them to do this. Wait- maybe BIG PHARMA did? They can never have enough cancer to treat. There's big money in cancer. Curing it would kill the profits and many jobs. But, you can't exactly lay it out to Americans like that. Instead, you talk about how- without regulation- everything will be cheaper... Right. Same with the Keystone Pipeline. It's Canadian tar sands oil that will travel through America (hopefully without spilling...) before it becomes gasoline in Houston to go into Chinese automobiles. But, don't say that. Say, DRILL, BABY, DRILL!! Come on now- who wants to charge LESS for their product?

Nobody! But, who wants to pay less to produce their products? Everybody! Payroll cuts into profits. Duh. Prior to The Civil War, the largest concentration of wealth in this country was in Vicksburg, Mississippi. Not New York which, then as now was huge. Do labor costs get any lower than slavery? After the initial buying of a person, you pretty much just have to feed them after that. And breeding them means less future initial cash outlay. And if you do need to pay for skilled labor, having a large labor force working for free sets the wage really, really low.

Well, we can't talk people into becoming slaves for the good of the country...but, we can talk them into accepting less and and expecting less, in pay, because- LOOK OVER THERE!!! Gay people planning weddings! With natural, organic food! Everyone arriving  by bicycles! And NO GUNS ALLOWED!

You know, if we get rid of this president and his BIG GOVERNMENT ways, we'd all be free. 

Well, to hear the newsvangelists tell it, that is. How can anyone fall for ALL that shit? A little at a time. ..

Thursday, June 20, 2013

The Impossibility Of Reason

That's supposed to be Hell is the impossibility of reason, a line from Oliver Stone's Platoon but, let's not be so dramatic. It's Topixtown, Ferrerman....

I write a bit about Topixtown because, if you're paying attention, it is often quite life-like. Quite real life-like. Just like imaginary people want to win Topix and will pull out all the stops to do so, so goes the  people on real life.

I sometimes think that the problem with planet earth is that the real leaders have discovered that there is no God. This means there is no heaven and no Hell. Since there is no higher power and a promise of heaven with a threat of hell to hold you accountable, you can grab all the gusto in life that you can because, nope, you can't take it with you so, do whatever you can get away with to have it all, right here- right now.

I'm not burdened by religion. And I'm not saying that you and others should be. I'm saying there's no way anybody in government or the media really is a believer. Really now- would you want anybody who believes in fairy tales controlling the world? It's perfectly fine to control your own world with religious fairy tales and politicians will always understand that religion is the opiate of the masses and use that to their benefit because it is the easy way to keep people from rioting in the streets while having sex with  animals THUS not getting any work done.

That is what it's all about; getting things done. We should worship Larry the Cable Guy. Keystone Pipeline a danger to the environment? Fuck that water supply/environment! There's money to be made selling gasoline to China! Get 'er done!

See, if you put it that way, it makes as much sense as It's God's will...

It really doesn't matter, in the whole spectrum of life, if you poisoned the Ogalala Aquifer in your greed. There's no God to care and the Senators said it was OK so, there you go. You and your rich buddies have plenty of water and that's what counts. The same goes for school lunches for poor kids and, while we're at, cutting welfare for the little bastards so they can't eat at home either. Do they wanna go all Les Miserables and steal some food? Well, somebodies good friend owns a taxpayer backed private prison. That'll learn 'em since public schools have been defunded and they can't afford private schools...

Well, you get my drift. The powers that be, having figured it all out, know that no God will judge them for an eternity so, heaven knows- anything goes! The religious lip service is still essential but, if the masses gave that any serious thought, they'd be in the streets with pitchforks and torches until they seized power. Well, the one's that could keep their hands off of the  animals, that is.

Oh- the Topix connection? In this respect, it's just like real life. The chicken fuckers are in control.

Goddamn them!

Oh- the irony of that...

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Talk about a blog that no one reads!

This weekend I learned of a rival blog whose (what's?) only purpose is to delineate Ferrerman's crimes against Topix humanity.

That, I had thought, was the purpose of this blog!

Worse, I was informed the blog was commissioned by a Pennsylvania woman and was being written by ...a lawyer!

What the fuck are they teaching in law school these days? Is the lawyering business in such a depression that attorneys have little to do but post on Topix in search of business? And now they are blogging about Ferrerman in preparation for yet another lawsuit?

Well, that's what I hear. Dondo Dork (not her real name!) said so. She's been busy passing around the link to the blog to various incendiary characters on Topix who may also believe that real lawyers create blogs to mock their adversaries before putting them in jail for the rest of their lives for heinous Topix crimes....

Sheesh- I don't mind her and her friends being that stupid but, do they have to believe Ferrerman would be that stupid too? I haven't felt this disrespected since Sublime announced he had retained a real attorney- not some flunkie patent guy- to sue me (and Hegel too) for causing him to believe that we were going to travel to his home to- well, I don't know. It was something about his wife being scared and, he was going to legally force us to fly to his home NO expense to find out- I guess- what the fuck he was rambling about. Sheesh.

So- yeah- a blog about me? I bet nobody reads it!

Would you?

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Can you hear me now?

I've known about this since 2006 and if you think that being a Ferrerman affords me some sort of top security clearance, you are wrong. I'm sometimes not even allowed on this blog! damn passwords... I read about it in the newspaper back then. The NSA listening to our phone calls was in all the papers! No wonder it didn't get much coverage.

And the thing I remember about reading about the NAS listening to our phone calls back in aught six was that, no one seemed to care. It just wasn't that big of a deal.

Well, we had a white president then, one that republicans approved of and congress and the people pretty much went along with everything The Dumbass did. Nowadays you can't swing a dead cat without hitting a House of Representatives voting relentlessly to repeal Obamacare. Life was so simple then!

One of the things that The Dumbass did was get Congress and America to go along with The Patriot Act, an act which (if you were paying attention) gave the gubmint broad powers in the name of fighting terrorism to do things like listen to domestic phone calls.

So, these revelations by Edward Snowden are not that earth shattering. The big question should be why is this news, now? Is this like voting on healthcare over and over again in case there is a different reaction by the Senate, because, you know- there could be if only you vote often enough?

Here's a clip of actor Shia Lebeouf on Jay Leno in '08:

Never mind the phone calls and the matter a fact, boastful way the FBI consultant presented Lebeouf  with a recording of the actor's phone call from two years prior- he freely admitted to him that they could use the ADT speaker system to listen to you talking in your own home! They can disable your vehicle via your Onstar system. Did you get the feeling that this was the tip of the iceberg? I don't know what the movie was and I guess he could be talking some shit to give credence to his (then) current film but...I think we know that the powers that be are surely capable of such things and not just to mess with the head of a young actor promoting a film.

What did we think The Patriot Act would do? More important, what did we think it wouldn't  do?

I guess my take is that it legitimized stuff they were already doing or were going to do anyway. It made us complicit because we didn't fight it them. That was the key- complicity. The hook was terrorism. We wanted them to do whatever it took to get Bin Laden and anyone else connected with 9/11.

I've long wondered which came first- The Patriot Act or 9/11?  Did they have to go to all that trouble?

If they want to catch spies and terrorists, why not do whatever is necessary to catch spies and terrorists and not tell us about it, kinda like they used to? Do we have to be in on it? Do they have to sift through our private conversations and the websites we visit on the 'net to do this? Or worse, do they have to pretend they are hunting terrorists  just to listen to our phone calls and track our porn viewing? I'm really not so sure this NSA/Patriot Act nonsense isn't just market research on steroids. Welcome to the Corporate States of America?

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Language Lessons

I wasn't going to write about this Michael Douglas stuff because I think it's silly. Or, do I think its silly?

I'm a few decades away from school and, admittedly, I think I forgot a lot of the grammar rules I might not have learned in the first place, over the years. So, I'm not sure if it's its or it's if its its or it's. Whatever it is...I made a similar fox paw on a site on Facebook that was about Michael Douglass's claim that he he got throat cancer from eating pussy. "eating pussy" is the phrase used by folks who find it difficult to spell cunnilingus- which, I just found out IS a spell-checkable! Imagine that. "cunnilingus" is a word that is best used when I make my stock joke about my being a cunning linguist. Get it? It's a double intender of sorts because I intend it to have a double meaning.

So, last night on a thread on Facebook (a political site, I should note) about Michael's assertion of how he got throat cancer, I posted that he had "made genius's out of black guys". Tee hee! One woman got that enough to like that and one fucking moron didn't get it enough to actually bother to correct my misuse of what I thought was the plural of genius but, I'm now guessing was the possessive? The asshole also thought I was "racist".

No, I was not. Anyone who knows anything about black guys knows that they do not eat pussy. Ask them- they will tell you. I've worked around black guys for years and this subject has a come quite often. If they don't bring it up themselves, some redneck will. Black guys are not shy about this at all. I think it's a religious conviction like Jews and Muslims eschewing pork by not ever chewing pork or any pork products. It might be Biblical. Do you want me to get Biblical on your ass like Samuel Jackson in "Pulp Fiction"? What? Say "what" one more time...

So, black guys not eating pussy sure makes them look like... geniuses... now, doesn't it?

Sheesh. If you've got to explain a joke maybe that audience was an idiot anyway? And, if you've got to exploit a Ferrerman's grammar or syntax, you have already lost the battle. I may not be an English Major (and I'm not) but, I am a cunning linguist!

Saturday, June 1, 2013


Speaking of do-nothing, Topix moderators....

Hegel was telling me last night that, after filing several complaints about objectionable posts about myself and Barbi, a mod emailed her demanding to know why- if Barbi and I hadn't complained, how could the posts be objectionable?

I guess the prerequisite for modhood is flunking out of Philosophy 101.

"If an objectionable post falls in the thread but, a Ferrerman is not there to observe it, is it a violation of the terms of service?"

Those mods are so fucking deep! I should wear waders!

She explained to the mod whom, despite the anonymity of a number instead of a name, refused to even identify itself by that number, that in my long history of complaining about the 100+ times that my real life name has been published on Topix, the mods have either done nothing or taken every minute of three business days to delete the posts in question. And, I might add, not a fucking thing to sanction the poster.

So, I'd complain but, who'd listen?

The mods are like fat, Southern sheriffs who work for the local klan. They'll do some 'vestigatin' riche soon, boy so, doan chu wary 'bout it- ya heah?!

There is nothing in the much modified Topix TOS about a specific person- and ONLY that specific person- being the only specific person to complain about specific posts directed at specific persons. The Topix TOS it seems, instead  of being written by a team of lawyers whose bosses worship them, seem to have been written by kindergarten teacher, Miss Elizabeth. In a nutshell:

"Try and be nice to each other. Just try..." 

So, with not much law to enforce, the fat southern sheriffs get fatter and philosophical and wonder why anyone would want them to do their job when it's so vague to begin with. The nerve! I've seen posts get pulled in minutes. None of them at my behest but, they were sometimes made by me. If you run with a gang, you can get lots of posts pulled by gang- complaining. The clique does that 24 and 7. The fat sheriff's don't seem to care who amongst them doth protest too much. I'm sensing a pattern.

I guess it's maybe nothing personal- just business. The Cliquers post constantly and schmooze the fat, sheriff mods. Hegel doesn't post any more and I don't post much at all. Really, none of my friends do. We're just not contributing to the Topix coffers like some people do. We're a bunch of squeaky wheels unwilling to grease the sheriffs as we should. (Ferrerman note: The metaphors work a bit differently in Topixtown. Don't try these stunts in school, kids!)  I get the business aspect. The fat, sheriff mods recognize that the usual suspects are trying to get Ferrerman and company to post with this obscene and troubling posts. Unless they are highly regarded attorneys, these miscreants are unpaid employees (interns?) trying to drum up business.

I don't know...seems kinda perseonal to me... Not really sure who is running the Topix show but, seems like they might be one of the inmates. Or Eight...

Special Guest Blogger Day- The Sequel!

Today's guest blogger is Sublime. He's posting about troubles on Topix and how he's parlayed them into a raise AND a promotion at work WITH the option to pursue legal recourse at a later date, if he chooses!

"The only thing they did to me is make me realize I dont even want to associate with them in any manner. I told my boss (we get along great ... hes a f'ing riot) what is going on and he agrees. It's best just to avoid and if necessary pursue legal action ... I share a lot of things with him because we get along so well.

He thinks they are all mental cases ... He said clearly the one is, but he also said he would question the sanity of his wife or any woman who behaves as he does was the greatest thing since sliced bread or even associated with such a person.

He said as long as you get your work done and you have ... That's why I'm getting a new title and have gotten raises ... He doesn't care what I do on here or in my private life. He said its none of his business (that's on part why I like him and have turned down other job offers). That's exactly how I would be too with a subordinate ... Just get your shyte done, period ... End of story. 

I have a great gig!"

Neat, huh? Yours truly whines about Topix, do-nothing mods and stalkers and this Sublime guy uses all those things to earn a raise AND promotion! You give that guy lemons and he'll make lemonade! Ferrerman will just ask for sugar and water to go along with those lemons. 

How many people are lucky enough to have a job where their boss admirers  their skills so much that they have NO problem with them posting with imaginary people on the internet during business hours? Not many, I'll bet! It really sounds like Sub's boss is encouraging him to post on Topix. I guess he's that good.  He sure sounds like he thinks he is.