Sunday, December 30, 2012

I'm A Fiscal Cliff Claven!

In all those restaurant rescue shows on TV, I've yet to see one where the owners complaint was that taxes were killing his/her business. It always seems to come down to poor management. Must be an Obama conspiracy...rather glaring that that is never the cause...

Can you imagine a country the size of America going over some imaginary fiscal cliff for want of a 4% tax hike on America's Filthy Rich? (Ferrerman note: That's the title of a new reality show that I'm pitching to whoever will listen. I'm not having much luck though. I keep hearing this is well-covered on the nightly news, cable news, commercials, and various HGTV programs. Rich people are very popular now as they have figured out ways to increase their fortunes in a lackluster economy AND get people to support them and blame POOR PEOPLE for, well, EVERYTHING! Pretty neat trick. They almost got one of their billionaires elected president by the very people they've made poor, even though they tried ridiculously hard to piss those people off! Another neat but stupid trick.)

I don't comprehend the fiscal cliff nonsense. I suspect it's more Washington smoke and mirrors. Is this the one where the republicans vote that we don't pay our debts (those fiscal conservatives!) and the economy tanks again and we install a white guy in office? Or, is this the one where, if we tax the rich people, they get mad and crash the economy- AGAIN!- because it worked out really well for them the last time? Or, is it both? It's hard to keep up.

I've admitted before that I don't understand the tax rate stuff with rich people. It seems to me that, when one is playing at a certain level, one has accountants to ensure that one doesn't pay any taxes or, as scant little as possible. So, 35 or 39% might as well be one million percent because you are not paying anything anyways. I've long suspected that it's one of those deals where it's the thought that counts. Like- asking people to pay 4 more percent of nothing is a slap in the face of one's butler and they just won't stand for that!

If the House, which evidently holds the purse strings of our country, don't want to pay off our debts, why should anyone pay off their debts? Seriously- credit card debt is a HUGE problem for millions of people. Quit paying Visa and you'll free up tons of money each month to spend and stimulate the economy. You'll probably lose your miles though so, think about that.

However, if the GOP has taught us anything during Obama's reign of terror, it's that spending is bad. Free of debt, you must curtail spending on everything but guns. Cut the arts. DO NOT go to the movies! Cut aide to women and children. The wife and those lazy, non-working children will be just fine and better persons for it. Cut education. Teachers make too much! Take that money and go to the Casinos! They are the poor man's Wall Street. But, above all, buy guns. The Second Amendment (are their really others???) says we are all militia. This means we should all buy guns. It says so right there.

Sheesh. I don't know when Somalia became our role model but, it seems that's what the House and the GOP want. I told you I don't understand this shit. Does anyone?

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Manufacturing Mayhem

For decades the US has armed small countries to support our interests in a region. There's been that but, make no mistake it's been for fun and profit as well. Mostly profit, really. The fun is that R&D gets to research and develop the capabilities of weaponry when we have no wars of our own to fight, using the flesh and blood of others. Sometimes arms can be traded for hostages. See: Iran Contra.

There's about 315 million people in this country. Given that we're friendly with our neighbors to the North and the South and have the finest military the world has ever known protecting us, it's just marketing genius that we  be supplied with guns to protect us from each other. I'm sure that's covered in The Second Amendment. Isn't everything? Here it is:

"A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed"

See? It's there. And NO gay marriage! Just like Jesus and the founders wanted it. 

Whether it's school shootings or car-jackings, we are reminded every day that we are in danger and the only solution is to arm ourselves to the teeth. It's an arms race.

Depending upon where you live, this is a very dangerous country. It's hard to argue that. Most of us will live long lives without ever being robbed or physically threatened where life or death is suddenly decided but, some among us deal with that nearly every day. Some do live in fear. 

But, not enough of us do, I think, from an NRA or gun manufacturers perspective. The tens of millions of Americans who do not own guns (or only one) are a market desperately needing to be tapped by them. Tapped and flooded would be ideal. 

Let's not kid ourselves. The NRA is nothing but a lobbying service for the gun makers. If you want to argue that "unions were a good thing back in the day but got too big for their britches..." you should really believe that the same argument could be made about the NRA and it's original intent to support hunting, sport shooting and gun safety. Funny thing but, the same folks who want to throw unions out with the bathwater are staunch supporters of all things NRA. There's NO danger of hunting being outlawed or gun safety being rejected, yet the NRA goes on and on. 

In 1996, in Port Arthur, Australia, a man killed 35 people and wounded 23 with a Colt AR15, equipped with 30 round magazines. Read about that, here: 

The  massacre  horrified Australia and they acted to severely restrict gun ownership.They haven't had a massacre since.

Here in America, earlier this month, 20 six year olds and six adults were murdered by a young man with a similar weapon. We were horrified but, we went out and bought more guns.

Wayne LaPierre, spokes-shill for the NRA and the gun manufacturers came out of hiding after a week and stated that the thing to do would be to arm all teachers and school personnel. And, of course, buy more guns!

Can you imagine the republican outrage if our African-American president had suggested arming teachers (who just months ago were Union thugs) or stated that putting armed police/security guards in every school was the solution? Good grief! With the fiscal cliff bullshit looming as we speak, that would be as insane as it is impractical. 

I imagine LaPierre has some outrage in his Kevlar-wrapped heart for what happened and some degree of sympathy for the dead. I might be wrong about that though. Rather, I think he saw opportunity and free publicity. 

We are a nation of people who can sell snow to Eskimos. Add patriotism and the 2A to that and the innate desire of most men (and many women) to be John Wayne and you've got a recipe for consumerism that cannot be beat. 

We can try though. We can try harder. There are 26 bodies- 20 of them as small as your children's- torn grotesquely apart by some motherfucker, also in his grave-  who now has other motherfuckers preaching the sanctity of the 2A as the solution rather than the cause. 

More, more and more...

Neither Jesus or the founders would have approved. 

Sunday, December 23, 2012


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Fine Print?

With the merits, demerits and total misunderstandings of the Second Amendment in the news, there seems to be a renewed interest in insurrection among the second place finishers from last months presidential election. First there was the on-line petitioning for secession. Like all such petitions, it was simply symbolic though, I'd bet a few folks thought they had checkmated the president. Hoisted by his own petard? No.

Here's the 2A as ratified by congress and the states:

"A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed."

Somehow some people find overthrowing a tyrannical Federal government in those words. I can't find it. Can you? It's not implied, hinted at or even written in invisible ink between the lines. To be Ferrer, some writings of the time by our founders discussed a right of people to rise up against tyranny but, also to be Ferrer, I think our founders were taking up for their right to do so, at the time. They weren't saying that we should make a regular occurrence of this revolution business. Why should they have?

Were we to have a revolution today, it would be an insult to every revolution in history as well as every future revolution. We would be the laughing stock of every nation, ever. 

See, every revolution I can think of was necessary. The masses were persecuted in Russia, China, France and Cuba. Kings and Monarchies were the ruling class and the masses scraped by with zero hope of representative change. When you ain't got nothing, you've got nothing to lose. Why not fight back? 

In the case of three of the above, the folks traded their dire circumstances for communism. The brochure did not mention they would be trading one brand of oppression for an other. The salesmen always gloss over that part. And those revolutions weren't keen on retaining any right for the people to exhibit any dissatisfaction with the new bosses. In fact, they took away the guns they had so freely handed out before the revolt and got pretty serious about locking up folks who looked like trouble. A little disingenuous of them, I think. 

The rest of the world knows we have no legitimate reason to revolt. Unlike the four countries mentioned, people are still sneaking into this country to partake in our wonderfulness. That ought to tell you something. There is this and that wrong here but, anybody can do this or that and live very well in this country. Hell- anything goes here! You can live like a drug dealer here just by dealing drugs or getting into venture capitalism. It doesn't really matter. The laws here make both possible. We've really got little to complain about in a historical context.

So, our wannabe-revolutionaries have to make stuff up. They don't like our president. Oh- it's NOT because he's black! Why that just has NOTHING to do with it! No, it's because he's a dictator...communist...socialist...secret Muslim...Kenyan...yada...fucking...yada...but, NOT because he's black. How could anyone get that idea that it's racial with all those so-definitive strikes against him?  I mean- really?

Ehhh, I don't really take talk of secession and revolution seriously. It all comes from internet typehards and slave state congressmen who probably know no one really cares about what they say. It's a lot of tough talk that is surprisingly easy to say with a straight face by some folks. It's said with no shame though. Imagine one of our secessionists visiting North Korea, Cuba or some third world country in Africa and complaining about the need for revolution in America. .I don't know if one of those citizens would laugh or cry. I wouldn't blame them if they cooked them and fed their village. 

Of course, because of the recent massacre of six year olds in Connecticut, the president is talking of the need for gun control. As any strict constitutionalist  can tell you, that means a total gun ban. (even though that's not at all what it means) and, as the 2A says; (quoting here?) "Them's fightin' words!"  

Ya know what would happen after a bloody revolution, if these gun nutters were to win? They'd take your guns away so you couldn't use 'em against them. That's not in the brochure. It never is. Just like it's not in our Constitution.  

Saturday, December 22, 2012

How the mighty have fallen!

I had heard a few years ago that he was the second or third richest person in Illinois, behind Oprah Winfrey, who was/is number one. Recently, with that in mind, I went to the Google to see if that were true.

Nope. Not anymore. While not among the poorest, he's now many, many millions shy of the lead. There were details of fraud and the defaulting on a $39 million loan from a major bank. A bank he owned had also closed. Twenty of his business's were in bankruptcy. He, his wife and their children were being sued and also filing personal and corporate bankruptcies. With ties to India, their passports had been confiscated by the authorities.

Dude fucked up.

Twenty years ago I worked for the man. It was hard to get him to admit this though. He tried extremely hard to believe that I worked for my brother-in-law. He tried to convince me of this. As if I wouldn't know! But, he also tried to convince the IRS of this. They, like me and my BIL, knew better.

The guy (I'll call him. "Apu") was the poster boy for greed. Though a pleasant, intelligent man, he was so obsessed with money that it was sadly comical. If I had a dollar for every time I heard him exclaim: "THAT IS NOT SAVING ME MONEY!!!!" I'd have a few million myself. "Saving (him) money" was his not spending it on bills for services rendered or arbitrarily cheating people out of theirs. In my case he tried to portray me as an independent contractor to keep me off his payroll and prevent him from being an employer, responsible for his share of my taxes, etc. Though a multi-millionaire at the time and an employer of a few hundred people, this literally saved him a couple thousand dollars. WINNING!

I guaran-fucking-tee this asshole was as excited about screwing- oops! SAVING!- someone out of a few thousand dollars as he would be clearing a million in a business deal. It was all about the same to him. In my case, it was his fantasy that I was an independent contractor responsible for my own taxes. In my BIL's case (and many others) it was simply a matter of not paying him for his services. You see, him having to pay for things WAS NOT SAVING HIM MONEY!!!! What part of that did people not understand???

Well, all of it. He was always verrrryyyy slooooowwww in paying my BIL, Johnny.  He was stringing Johnny along. When Johnny completed work for him and went to collect payment, Apu would promise to pay and then reward Johnny with more work. Johnny didn't like Apu being so slow to pay but, he would eventually get around to parting with payment. Johnny was happy to have the work. He did distress over that plus having to negotiate every transaction. For example, if a job would cost Johnny $2,000 to perform (material, labor, profit...) Apu would immediately ask that Johnny do the work for $1,000. The method to his madness was cutting the price in half. I suggested to Johnny that he double his bids, let Apu "win" by doing his thing and make the fair profit at his real price. Then everyone is happy! YAY!

Well, I'm no business major. Does it show? Negotiation- bartering- is typical of other cultures. Indians are really in love with it. However, simply cutting an offer in half isn't exactly the art of the deal. On Pawn Stars, Rick will go to a grand, hoping to get it for an item being sold to him but, will go to $1500 if he can get it because he knows that's a fair price for him and the seller. That's Rick though. Apu would have no idea what Johnny's should be. He just knew any price was too high and slavery was illegal (DAMMIT!) and just to cut the price in half...

Greed really can be a sickness. If beating a poor man out of a few thousand is as important to you as making a million dollars, you have a problem. The problem is that you are an asshole. So many rich people are. It perturbed me then, as now, that so many people tend to shrug people like Apu or the Koch brothers off by saying: "Well, that's how they get rich..." as if that justified it. That is the method to the madness. The madness is good.

I burned Apu and the bridge behind me to him by consulting with the IRS at tax time. I had given this guy every chance to do right and include me on his payroll but, he resisted. That wasn't saving him money, after all. I put these wheels in motion when he laid me off in an attempt to get me to come back to work for less pay. That wasn't going to happen. I knew that the IRS would agree that I was an employee. To determine these things they have a list of 20 questions about your employment that prove whether one is an independent contractor or an employee. I was all twenty. I was an employee.

This cut my tax burden in half. They went after him for the other half. I kinda liked the lovely irony of that.

I don't know exactly how bad off he is right now but, bankruptcies, frozen assets, foreclosures and lawsuits might pale in comparison to the ignominy of a Ferrerman not saving him money!!!! Oh my...

Johnny refuses to discuss how much Apu beat him out of. I think we're talking five figures. It hurts, for sure. He should have paid closer attention to what had happened to me and to his own former boss's refusal to work again for "that chiseler". That's human nature. It's easy for us to look at the plight of others and tell ourselves that that won't happen to me. 

I learned a lesson. Greed is not good. It's not good for me and it's not good for you. OK, I knew that going in but I really learned it after that. Apu was a thief. He stole big and he stole small. He simply lived to steal. He wasn't a drug dealer or a gangster but he had the soul of one. That would be no soul at all, for those of you scoring at home.

I guess there's one good thing in his favor right now: he won't get soaked by Obama when The Bush Tax Cuts For Rich People expire. That'll save him money...

Friday, December 21, 2012

Worst Apocalypse Ever!

The other side of the coin of guns is the very real possibility (likelihood?) of a complete breakdown of society. One that probably doesn't involve zombies or revolution as a result of a Black president taxing our wealthiest citizens. The HORROR....

Yep, there was another show about preppers and their readiness for the myriad of apocalypses that we face. This one, on The History Channel, got in under the wire for the Mayan Apocalypse which didn't actually happen, by the way. (Ferrerman note: The day ain't over yet though...)

There are plenty of people prepared to live underground in the event of any sort of catastrophe. Sheesh- I couldn't do that. I'm a bit claustrophobic. I hope to be cremated- after I die, that is.

I guess these bunkers are good to go for most any tragedy, man-made or nature induced. If you've got the money, several companies can hook you up with whatever level of subterranean comfort you can afford.  A former Navy SEAL discussed people going animal, usually within 72 hours of an occurrence like a hurricane or a severe earthquake. Most would probably go animal sooner so, his advice was to plan ahead and take off as soon as possible and avoid the rush. Forget about the interstates as everyone would have the same idea. One fella was prepared to bicycle with his shotgun and family from California to Texas. I don't know why Texas. Maybe to link up with other crazies?

Though it's a good idea to be prepared for trouble, the vast majority of us are too busy trying to make it through each day and week to worry or afford several months worth of provisions. When you think about it, what wouldn't you need in troubled times? We're so used to fresh drinking water that the thought that the taps might run dry is far from our minds. Who would give a thought to showers and toilet flushing? A human can go 40 days without food but only four without water. Potable water will be a huge necessity in most scenarios. Plus, since we're Americans, many assholes will still insist on washing their SUV's.

Then there is the complete breakdown of law and order which will surely follow. If folks think it's bad now when it takes minutes for cops to respond, wait until phone service is out of commission and no one hears your plea for help. It's already happened in New Orleans during Katrina. People found out pretty quick that they were on their own. The logistics of a catastrophe are fairly easy to predict if you think, for example, about a severe snowstorm in your town. Services can grind to a halt.

Part and parcel of probably every prepper is firepower. Would way too much ammo be enough? Should I get more? The reality is you will have to kill people. Many (most) would have no problem killing you for your food or water. You might rethink semi-automatic rifles then. That nice couple down the street might not be so nice after all. And you might not like to have them over for dinner like in the old days. It would be every man, every family, for themselves. It won't be pretty. If you thought life was cheap in the city, wait until home values drop in your suburb to, whoever has the biggest gun.

Well, looks like we dodged the bullet with this Mayan one. SCAMPS! They punked us! We've got the fiscal cliff to look forward too though. I think we'll get punked on that, too.

You just never know....

Thursday, December 20, 2012

A Polite Society

"An armed society is a polite society"

Prove it.

Many gun fanciers cite our Old West as 'evidence' of this. Given that most of our common knowledge of the Old West is via television and movies, how could anyone possibly think this? Our Old West is largely mythological but, if barroom shootouts are any one's idea of "polite" then I'd like to know what they consider to be impolite.  Samuel Colt's .45 caliber revolver was known as "the peacemaker" and "the great equalizer", as in "God made man, but Sam Colt made them equal". I suspect that meant that little men could fight back against bigger, bullying men by shooting them in the back. It appears there weren't so many of the shootouts at high noon between two well-matched rivals as we've been led to believe.

My state is poised to become the 50th state in the nation to pass a form of concealed carry of handguns. I'm not against it. The reality is that Chicago is one of the most dangerous cities in the country, if not the world. Lots of crime. Good people should be able to defend themselves. Sad but true.

But, ya know, where I live in the suburbs, my life is not likely to be threatened by anyone whether they have a gun or not. Violent crime is pretty rare here. Sure, it could happen. I just cannot fathom a situation that would reasonably occur where I should readily carry a gun. I'm rather thick-skinned so, no need to force people to be polite to me. I'm quick-witted too so, in a battle of wits, most of my adversaries are over-matched. Real life, like Topix Boot Hill, is full of the metaphorical bodies of those who have tried to go up against The Ferrerman....

Anyways... I don't fancy a town here where everyone is toting firearms. We're supposed to be well past that and, in most of the country were have been for the several generations we've been removed frpm Dodge City and Tombstone. It's really been in the last 20-30 years that this gun madness has been deemed 'necessary' in our social fabric. The 60's and 70's of my youth weren't like this. Guns were something we saw on TV and really thought of as foreign in a sense and peculiar to the cops shows on TV and, of course, bank robbers and Mafia hit men in real life. As much as I had liked westerns and cop shows back in the day, I never really foresaw the time when I would have need for a gun.

That's the thing- the need. We should be beyond that in society by now, with our standing armies and police forces. Cops have always been armed here even though most criminals they were chasing probably were not. That's kind of a holdover from the old west too where, the town marshal had to be ready for anything and him being armed was a deterrent for many folks. Cops aren't necessarily the deterrent they used to be. Jail isn't either. For some, it's a way of life. That's been a big change too in the last generation. Crime seems to be a lot more profitable.

There are big bucks in all aspects of this. Violent crime creates an arms race. As criminals arm and get bolder, citizens feel the need to be armed as well. It's pretty easy to see that gun manufacturers profit greatly from this. So do security companies. The NRA went from being promoters of gun safety and hunting to a radical force in politics. Street gangs went from public nuisances  to criminal enterprises- like Mafia's but with more color and no virtuous Don Corleone's. It got crazy realquick, didn't it? Who's idea was this?

I don't know about a conspiracy but, we are a consumer driven society. Guns are fun and sexy and useful in that they can protect you. The trouble is, they are needed to protect us from others with guns. We the people created this. I think the invisible hand of the free market helped but, somehow, we let it happen. However it happened, I don't see it coming to a halt any time soon. Guns are too big of a business. In this economy and certainly in this political climate, I don't see a sudden parting of the blood red sea of gun play that may one day be looked at wistfully as something that maybe should have happened in the form of a complete ban and confiscation.
Right now, within hours of the massacre of  20 children and six adults in Connecticut, we had gunners on the right not wanting to discuss any notion of gun control and, when pressed, desiring only to argue that the killers weapon of choice was not an assault rifle... Well, fuck me a running- semantics! Loopholes! Where did they learn that?

"A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed."

See? There you go! If that doesn't settle gay marriage and the abortion debate, I don't know what will!

Sigh. It's a bit vague, isn't it? Lot's of folks kinda bypass the militia portion, which was very important at the time but, not so much now. Citizens had the need to band together at the time to combat Kings  who might (did) oppress or to battle Indians. And hunting? That was THE way of putting meat on the table in 1776. The founders had no reason to believe that would ever be different. Hunting was not in question at the time. Crime? Given the unreliability of the single shot muskets of the day, if you missed, you better have a sword or knife on hand. I would have done all of my robbing with one. I bet others would have too. The founders could not have envisioned the weapons of today or the vast millions of people using and misusing them today. Smart men but, not a one of them was Nostradamus. It's disingenuous to have expected them to be. The 2A could have been worded better but, it sufficed for the time. It needs to be re-written, as soon as possible. What will the world be like 200 years from now? We don't know now just as they didn't know then. We just know now to be afraid, very afraid...

Monday, December 17, 2012

Can we talk?

Last night, before bed, I watched an old episode of COPS. In this episode, paramedics had been called  to the trailer of an older woman who was in some sort of distress. The police arrived and were informed by rescue personnel that the woman was living in squalor and the smell was sickening. The police officer retrieved a respirator from the trunk of his car and entered the home. The trailer was wall-to-wall trash and cat poop. Part of the smell was a dead cat which, we would later learn, the woman wondered if placing the cat in the freezer wouldn't be a good idea. The officer noticed maggots crawling on his shoe as he interviewed the woman. It was an unbelievable, filthy mess. Who in their right mind would live like that?

Indeed. Who in their right mind?

After the horrific carnage in Newton, I'm glad to hear so many people are talking about mental health. The woman on TV was not a poor housekeeper. She knew- seemed to know- her home was beyond messy. Something wasn't right to her but, if you think putting a dead animal in your freezer is a solution to one problem, the rest of the problem is lost on you.

Well, it's COPS. There's no background on peoples lives in the reality series and no follow-ups on what became of them so, we don't know how she lived her life and how it brought her to live, at that moment, in such incredible filth. Who knows if she had once been normal and how she slipped into mental illness. That's clearly what it is- mental illness. I've never seen the show "Hoarders" and don't want to but, it seems that people living like that is quite common. It's not to be mocked or exploited to sell hair care products but, that's entertainment.

Let's remember that the killer in Connecticut was 20 years old. He wasn't a gang banger or a punk kid with an attitude. He was clearly mentally ill. He wasn't some asshole on the internet angry about taxes or a black president and willing to take up arms. He was somebody's kid. Somebody's very damaged kid.

Imagine your worst day. Multiply it by one thousand and maybe then you'll scratch the surface of the depth of the depravity it takes to take a rifle to a school and literally blow away young children whom you do not know. This must be what this kid's mind dealt with every fucking day. Maybe some meds helped. Perhaps some made things worse.  He's dead so, we'll never know. We might not have ever known even if he had not killed himself. Why would we expect that he could explain himself?

There's about 315 million people in this country. The odds are there are hundreds of thousands of them that are as bad off as he was. Maybe millions. How many people do you know who, properly medicated, are maybe just a little bit odd? You don't know. How many could go off similar to this if they went off their medication or took too many or weren't ever prescribed at all? There's no way of knowing and we need to address that.

We need to restrict access to guns, for sure. But, just as important, we need to make mental health access far less restrictive. It's for the good of society. It's one thing to try and keep firearms out of the hands of people like Adam Lanza and that is a good thing. I assume his folks were aware of his mental condition and addressed that. Tragically, they could not foresee his murderous rampage. Tragically, the mother at least, could not see that keeping weapons around the house was not a good idea. Whatever his day-to-day existence was like, this was not a child who should have been left alone with a pistol. He could easily have just taken his own life. Tragedy in itself but, no other people and families would have been harmed.

Weren't many of us thinking that? Reasonable people don't think of that as a viable solution on the front end. It's normal, I guess, to think about that after the fact. What if...

Right now I don't know the extent of the help Adam Lanza received. My mind keeps coming back to the mom foolishly keeping guns around the house knowing full well that her youngest was quite damaged. This compromised her safety as well as his. With guns out of the equation we don't know what does happen but, we now know what doesn't happen.

It's too late to undo that. But, it's not too late to do every reasonable thing we can think of to prevent some other sick child or adult from crossing that line into hell on earth.

Perhaps with Obamacare money won't be an impediment to folks with mentally ill children. That is one thing he can do as our president. Make it easy to get help.

Restrict assault weapons. Yada-fucking-yada there are already enough laws... Well, we need a few more and we need to get serious about them. We've already created an America that is more violent than any other first world nation and the fact is we do need guns to protect ourselves, from ourselves. We made that happen. Crime does pay. It pays the NRA and the gun manufacturers. They sell fear and business is good.

Well, that's for another day. Feel for the children and adults whom Adam Lanza slaughtered. But, feel for him too. It wasn't the way he wanted to go out in life. Speak his name. I don't think he was out to have his name live in infamy. I think he just wanted out, in the worst way possible. Think of him as your own child or sibling and treat him as such. Make sure they get all the help they need. Think, before it gets to that point with the next child.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Coffins and coffers

A woman friend of mine whom I have known since third grade made a good point today, after the latest school shooting.

She said: "Hunters should quit the NRA en mass. They are being used."

Indeed, they are. Hunters did not do this horror in Connecticut. The NRA certainly wouldn't sanction it. But, with their obsession to arm America at any and all costs, they are, indeed, part of the problem.

There's no danger to the sport of hunting being eliminated. The seasons go on as they always have and they always will. Shooting deer and elk is not the problem in America. Shooting children, shoppers and spouses is. If you are a hunter, why give your money and membership support to an organization that really isn't concerned with hunting? Wayne La Pierre spoke before the election and told his members that Barack Obama WOULD take away their guns, if given a second term. Would. No uncertain terms. Obama wouldn't stop them from hunting. Heck, the only gun control issue he addressed in his first term was allowing citizens to carry in National Parks. That's not the action of a totalitarian dictator like the NRA and others love to paint Obama as. Only an idiot could see it as a clever ruse...

This is why I get angry with the gun-nutters. They want it all and they want NO restrictions. As it says in the Second Amendment...shall not be infringed... And they take that to mean, no restrictions whatsoever. Full-auto? Yep. Carry anywhere? Yep. Permits? No. School shootings? No, but, we have a way to deal with them...

There is an arms race in this country. Is it absurd to think that the gun manufacturers don't quietly see Sandy Hook as a marketing opportunity? They are selling fear and business is good. Fear drives their sales and fills their coffers. Without the fear of mass murderers and gangs of dark tinted people shooting up neighborhoods (that aren't but could be your neighborhood next) the gun  culture is a niche of sportsmen and folks who like to shoot and it is nowhere near as profitable as it could be.

They won't be happy until this nation is Somalia but with white people. A nation of folks toting the very latest in firepower and yearning for more. No way, you say? We are a society of consumers. Why would this surprise anyone?

The nutters were quick to say that 'if the teachers had been armed...'

Odd, but these are generally the same folks who try to tell us that public school teachers and their unions have failed society. Now they want them armed? Well, of course! A new market.

Guns are a product. Half of marketing is creating a need for your product where there is none or should be none. You have to sell your product to survive! Seemingly 'bad publicity' like Sandy Hook is 'good' for them. The world got that much more frightening and ugly. We the people have to protect ourselves. This, is just another reason why...

Cry for the children and grown ups in Connecticut. Not too far away, in that state, in New York state and elsewhere in America and the world, they are smiling. Sales are going to rise. The Second Amendment will come under attack but be strengthened by politicians and pundits. Business is good...

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Hook ups

I should be offended. Perhaps you should be too.

I discovered a new junk-TV show- well, new to me. "Repo Games" is, of course on SPIKE TV. It's a game show actually and not to be confused with that awful show where they recreate repossessions with all the authenticity of the Wrestlers from the WWE. Repo Games involves real people, behind in their car payments whose vehicles are to be legally repossessed.

The switch is, if they answer three of five questions correctly, their car is paid off and they keep it. Get three wrong and the car is towed away, something that was going to happen anyway. It's not a bad deal.  But, is it exploitation? Is it dragging out the private failings of people  already on hard times, for the entertainment of others?

Yes, of course it is.

But, folks can choose to not participate and just go ahead and let their car be towed and take the hit to their credit rating or scramble to get the cash to get it out of impound and never suffer the indignity of appearing on reality television. Seriously now, what would you do?

I'd go for it. The questions are surprisingly hard and surprisingly easy. It's general knowledge stuff, the stuff that you know and are surprised that others do not. The hosts are two engaging, very big guys, Josh Lewis and Tom Detone, who evidently are professional repo men, not actors. They are very personable guys who really make the show. They are there to take people's cars away and that can bring out the worst in people so, it helps a lot (I think) that you better think one, two and several times about thinking that you can kick either one's ass, no matter how upset you are. I imagine there is some other security involved...just in case. If not, there is a camera crew of perhaps ten guys that might help out. A lot of these people do come out of the house angry. However, they KNEW repossession was an inevitability without the show. With the show, it's 15 minutes of *fame* on TV and the best chance of keeping your car and paying it off. In non-TV life, the repo man rolls up quickly and quietly and wake up the next day realizing you know have to walk to- everywhere. Thanks to their size and demeanor, Josh and Tom seem to be able to defuse any situation. The cameras help a lot too! Like any reality show a lot happens that winds up on the cutting room floor. I think the hosts calm these folks down because nearly all get it together enough to have some fun during the Q & A. Some losers accept the agony of defeat and some get angry again. The winners are ecstatic.

Exploitative? Yes. We're not seeing people at their best. If they had known the repo show people were coming, they might have showered and dressed for the occasion. The victims are not the best and brightest this country has to offer. But, if you've ever seen the "Jaywalking" segment of "The Tonight Show", those knuckleheads aren't either. Those folks don't have anything to lose but a few moments of their dignity. We get a harsh scan of these car owner's lives though. These are people whose lives have been kicked around before. This might be their best shot at winning, something. You can't help but root for most of these people. They may not be too smart but they are just trying to get by in life. And, if keeping and getting a 4 to 12 year old car off gets them that much further in life, why not?

Saturday, December 1, 2012

If I was a master thief, perhaps I'd rob them?

These days, the closest anyone is going to get to being an Evil Genius is to become an internet troll.

Sure, your lair will be in the proverbial mom's basement but, the world doesn't have to know that. Just don't admit to anything true and you'll be just fine.

Like the toddler who covers his eyes and thinks that you can't see him, trolls think they have everyone fooled. Well, yeah, they pretty much do but, that's more so because nobody really cares who they are.

A friend alerted me to a Dr. Phil show about "catfishing".  I'm not much on Dr. Phil so, it's no surprise I missed the episode but, I am familiar with the term. I looked at some clips on-line from the episode. Evidently a woman had gone to great internet lengths to romance some other women, convincing them that she was a man named "Shaun". Who does something like this? Why?

Topix trolls aren't too far removed from these sad gigolos, in search of lonely hearts. Just more gregarious maybe? Having been so high-profile on Topix myself, I've been the object of the ire of several trolls. Or, just one? It's really hard to say, ya know, because they're...evil genius's!

Troll gender is often assumed or taken at the troll's word. But, just as the ladies on Dr. Phil were sure they were falling in love with a man, I'm sure my stalker Sam (for example) is a man. I mean- why would he lie about that?

That was sarcasm, by the way.

No offense to women but, Sam has bitch written all over him. I'm not being mean. I just don't think a man stalks another man like that. Maybe a gay man does. Sam is either a very disgruntled woman or a very disgruntled gay man. A straight male just does not make a four year commitment to stalking me or any other man on the internet or in real life. Sheesh- come on!

It was similar with Angelique770 who claimed womanhood and read like one but, might have been a gay man too. Who knows? Unless you meet all these people in real life, you pretty much have to take them at unseen face value. I can still keep my liberal card and point out that a lot of gay men do have feminine qualities. This would be because they do ya know.

It's like being anyone or any number of people on the threads. If you really think you are fooling anyone, you are- you're fooling yourself. That's where these Evil Genius Trolls come in. I mean- to have a secret identity- ON THE INTERNET- wow... But, not just to have one but, BE A MASTER OF DISGUISE...and be anyone you any time! There's not a lot of fucking idiots that can pull that off!

More sarcasm...

Sigh. People's sad lives. Some just can't limit themselves to one.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012


This morning I received this from the concerned moderators at Topix:

This is a warning from the Topix moderators. Failure to comply with the Topix Terms of Service will result in your forum posts being removed from the system, and a ban on future posting. (click here to acknowledge this warning)
How about staying away from the "tard" word. Also stop posting to Dr. Dirty. He claims he stopped posting to you and you are the one that kept it up. admin@topix

Monday, November 19, 2012


After Obama's reelection, I took a few victory laps around Topix. It was fun! Honestly, a lot of the teaparty faithful retreated into their bunkers the moment the race was called, cyanide pills and Luger's at the ready. But, others quickly reemerged once they rationalized... that voter fraud (by democrats!) had been the reason for Obama's quick, decisive victory.

As noted here and elsewhere, the second-place finishers have not at all been gracious in defeat. They took it kinda hard.

Part of my victory tour included actually watching Foxnews for a change instead of getting all my Foxnews from Jon Stewart. There's nothing wrong with getting your Foxnews from Jon Stewart. He's really quite fair about how unbalanced they are. But, you have to see some things for yourself so you don't become like Foxnews and cheerfully accept everything you are told.

For the record, the three stooges on "Fox and Friends" are every bit as vacuous and slimey as portrayed on Saturday Night Live and perhaps funnier in real time, portraying themselves.  They truly are idiot puppets. All seem to have trouble reading the teleprompters and should either get glasses or adopt the "LEAN FORWARD"  slogan that MSNBC uses.

Fox takes itself far too seriously. I think they so badly want war with Spain, that they are willing to do anything...

Wait- I said "Spain". I think I meant "Fill In The Blank..." War with Spain was William Randolph Hearst's thing in some other century, back when people were supposed to "Remember the Maine!" Now you just struggle to remember the talking points Fox beats into the heads of it's faithful. Ironically, the talking points are "TALKING POINTS" right now. It is a huge deal with Fox that the enemy administration (Obama and Friends) might not have known every fucking thing that happened at the consulate in Benghazi, at the exact moment it happened and presented it in "talking points"

Talking points are things to talk about. News shows have talking points. Fox, for example, would have talking points about bad things that happen that can be directly associated with Obama and Friends.  They would make a point of talking about things that reflect (deflect?) poorly on the Obama administration if you state everything in a rhetorical tone. Don't you find that odd? How long has this been going on? Why don't they admit it? When did they know this? Why didn't they say something about this sooner? And yada? Yada fucking yada? Well, YADA!!!!

There are a couple of things going on here. For some reason they want to redefine "talking points". Maybe they bought the licensing/ copyrights to it? That might be it. Could be the moneymaker that "Remember The Maine" was.

But, maybe they just really, REALLY hate Susan Rice? John McCain sure does! I think he might be senile and thinking she's either Condi Rice or maybe even Sarah Palin. Whatever, he wants her off his lawn!!!!

That makes as much sense as anything else they are talking about...

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

If at first you don't SECDEE...

Well, links/schminks. I couldn't conjure up the one of the folks calling for secession from the US with a sign that spelled out: "SECDEE". And, the news of the past few days has been that in more than 30 states, tens of thousands of people have signed internet petitions in a move that they very stupidly believe will allow them to be free of the shackles of socialism that is evidently the US at this very moment under Barack Hussein Obama and will free them to have the ice cream for breakfast that they desire.

They haven't thought this thing through...

Apparently, last week's presidential election didn't go over well with some of the citizens of the red states. They are disgruntled. However, none of these disgruntled citizens is a governor or any sort of elected official empowered- by the Federal government- to set forth any sort of legislative actually secede from the US of A. So, this is the legal equivalent of one of those internet meme's that implore people to 'like' this tinfoil hat-wearing goat to see if it gets more likes than Glenn Beck.

Sheesh. OK, though, it's a statement!

A statement of what though? Stupidity? Duh! We already knew a whole slew of stupid people don't like Obama because yada-fucking-yada, this-that-the other thing and, of course, etc. etc. The list goes on...

You know what is really lacking in this country? A sense of shame. And, spelcheck for everyone. These people have no sense of shame. I'll bet not a damn one of them is ashamed of their anti-American sentiment or the childish, fucking ignorant way they persist in going on about it. Pathetic!

What could happen if these states were allowed to secede  with only a fraction of a percentage of their citizens making that call? Well, this:

Nothing 'good' for them would be the short answer but, maybe lots of good for the rest of us. We could save  hundreds of billions of dollars by letting them go. This would be money that could be used for rebuilding our infrastructure, schools, healthcare... This could be awesome! Cut loose all the whiners. Send all their congressmen home! No FEMA for you! No tax money! No pro sports. Well, no everything they are used to and take so for granted.

We get to keep everything! We'll probably be taxed less too. How'bout that? Without all those dependents down south and scattered about the west, we'll have a lot more cash on hand to spend in a much smaller area. More bang for our bucks. Nice!

We'll really have to do something about our new borders though. There are a lot of nice people living in the Confederacy now and they may seek asylum here. And well they should. We'll make room. Black folks in particular might get a little hinky considering their past historical position in the southern states and the very real possibility that folks down there might once again desire that they pick cotton again, just for room and board! Although, if you know any black folks currently, you probably also know that that ain't gonna fly, this time! Yikes!

So, if the South should go south on us, I'd give them a year. Yes, I know they have nice weather and can grow their own food and they've got guns and they hunt and can string a troutline and all that happy shit. Camping is a lot of fun until you realize it's how you'll live the rest of your life. See, most southerners don't rely on rabbit and deer for their meals. They've done got used to Piggly Wiggly. They like Piggly Wiggly.

Oh well, it's not gonna happen anyway. None of these assholes is going to move to Canada either. Just sour grapes of wrath from the whine country of America. It's another vintage year for those 2nd place finishers.

Monday, November 12, 2012

The Spy Who Loved Storms

As a penis-bearer, I know how these things happen. It doesn't matter how smart or disciplined a man is, as long as he has one, he's eligible to get in trouble. It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt.

I don't know why anyone is shocked about General Petraeus. Well, except for Mrs. that is. And maybe she knew. As much as I know about it, he's a powerful man (CIA Director) and he messed around with a nice looking woman who was writing a book about him. The book's title, by the way, "All In". If that doesn't make you giggle, I don't know what will.

This morning I watched "Fox & Friends" to see what sort of a fuss they were making out of it. I already pretty much knew their spin on it would be, well, off-kilter. They just recently lost an election ya know and they're still trying to lose it. The blonde hostess wanted to know: "What did Obama know and when did he know it?"

The same folks who down-play 'his' having killed Osama Bin Laden (turns out Navy SEAL's did the actual 'killing') seem to expect that he should be The Presidential Peeping Tom and looking in bedroom windows, I guess. They are all over the 'timing' of this story and how it relates to their version of the events in Benghazi which, just hasn't caught on like they hoped it would. They see a conspiracy in that. As far as they are concerned, "Hurricane Sandy" should really have been called "Operation Sandy" as it was most likely a plot to usurp Mitt Rmoney's ascension to the White House rather any ol' weather system. Their other big story is how FEMA and the Obama government are 'failing' with their handling of the storms aftermath. Turns out it's not perfect. Well, shit, compared to Katrina... "WHEN DID OBAMA KNOW ABOUT THIS 'STORM'..."

Sheesh. If these knuckleheads can't comprehend storms, how could we expect them to understand penis's  and their rather obvious fit with lady parts? Storms happen. So does sex. There IS often conspiracy with the latter but, storms general require severe changes in barometric pressure or God being angry with gay people. Something like that.

Much of life is simply ironic timing. Shit happens. It happens when it happens, sometimes with curious coincidence.

Petraeus stepping down as CIA director doesn't mean he can't testify about Benghazi even if Fox thinks it's some kind magic cloak of invincibility available only to 2nd term black democrat Presidents. Nope. The interim guy can testify to the same knowledge as he can. Or, he can. Regardless, neither will testify to the facts as seen by Fox so, more conspiracy after this word from our sponsors...

Fox is very hard to please. They spend years telling the nuts that listen to them that 'big government is evil and YOU don't want it' and then, as soon as people need big government, they complain that people need big government but, it turns out, big government is inept.

Well, Sandy was a big deal. Lot's of damage. It affected millions of people. Such a storm can do incredible damage in such a short amount of time. It can take months to build a house and 30 minutes to destroy it. Such is the timing in life. It takes time to rebuild. Duh.

Fox and their friends should know this. They've been tearing down America daily for years now. We the people keep rebuilding though, despite them and because of them. It's what we do.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Chicken sandwiches falling from the sky

Probably the best internet meme I've seen after the election (and there were billions) noted an episode here that I had forgotten about. Remember the lines at Chick Fil A? Republican haters, in an effort to defeat the gay agenda, lined up to buy chicken sandwiches.

Now, remember the lines in Florida? Those lines were filled with democrats seeking only to defeat the republican agenda by voting. No chickens or chicken sandwiches there. Just voters.

Hard to believe the republicans lost....

They haven't been gracious in defeat. There has been a lot of loose talk about secession and revolution. Donald Trump called for (I think) "A Millionaire March On Washington". I don't know but, he is pissed. Our patriots are really, really pissed about this democratic process of ours! Karl Rove, who hasn't gotten a president elected in several years (he must have peaked with Bush) claims Obama used "voter suppression tactics" to steal the election. Specifically, the tactic was campaign ads. Maybe they should run a few ads next chance they get...

Oh my...Yep, it's all over but the whining. But, saber-rattling? Still?

They've made such noise the last four years. Part of me really thought that, this time, they would just sorta sigh and actually shut the fuck up. But, the better part of me knew that they would not. Many of them really see Obama as 'Manchurian candidate' whose whole goal was to win a second term as president to take over the country... Um, you can't do a coup in the first term? Are their rules about this? Really? A Manchurian has to: (a) get elected and (b) get elected a second time to (c) pull off a coup? Snooze going after that second term and you just don't get that coup.

The problem with the GOP is that, in the political buffet of life, they load up their plates with the dressing and side dishes and appeal to those who like those things as well. They talk about the meat and potatoes but, never really put it on their plate.

They made this election about gays, women, abortion, state's rights, yada-effing-yada and attracted people who were obsessed with the smaller issues in life. I say 'smaller' because most of these issues were already decided long ago. They concentrated on undeciding them. They voted to try and change the past rather than effect the future. Those things weren't exactly on the ballot but they had a candidate that hinted that he would  work to change history.

What the fuck were they thinking? And why were they thinking this?

Well, they believed their own foolish Fox Party hype. More foolishly, they believed everyone else believed it too. Their experts assured a landslide victory in the Electoral College, by Mitt Romney, of 300+ EC votes. A MANDATE! However, Obama- who wound up with 332 EC votes- somehow did not receive a mandate. Go and figure that. Obama also won the popular vote by 3 million. A win is a win and those numbers are pretty damn good.

A lot of experts are saying that the GOP is toast. Some think that they are one slim Chris Christie away from regaining the White House. Maybe. If Chris drops a hundred pounds and they drop the image of him hugging Obama after Sandy, maybe. And Maybe Marco Rubio is the future face of the party. Who knows? A lot can happen in four years. It won't be good unless they try to change.

They need to divorce themselves from their political arm- Foxnews. Dump Limbaugh and Ann Coulter. Erase the hate. Leave those assholes to those disjointed Tea Parties. By the way, dump them assholes too! They got you all to second place. That's not winning.

And, yeah, go back in time a bit. Just don't go back there to fight abortion, Civil Rights or The Civil War. Go back to being the republicans that were the GOP up to the Reagan era. Stress that 'fiscal conservatism' stuff. It was bullshit lip-service but it got you in office while being the Party Of Hate just got you runner up. Lose the Xtianity bullshit too. We're NOT a Christian nation by design or 'popular' intent no matter what you think. There is no war on Xmas by the way, unless you fight it.

Just give up all this stupid shit or go the way of the Whigs or the Know Nothings. It's your destiny, not ours. We're moving FORWARD. Perhaps you heard?

Friday, November 9, 2012

The People were Outstanding!

I was a little scared until I saw the long lines in Florida and Ohio...

Whether you watch MSNBC or Fox or The NFL Today, you are watching folks whose job it is to make the game seem better and closer than it really is. They want you watching. They need you watching. It's what they do.

Chuck Todd. Chuck "Fucking" Todd, as I like to call him, was going on for days about the possibility of a 269-269 tie in the presidential race. Others touched on that too but, it was his thing. Was it a possibility? Sure. Almost anything is possible. I'm graced with exceptional, very- basic math skills and I know that. Life is 50/50, most of the time. Something either happens or it does not. But, the pundits, whose job it is to keep you watching and (hopefully) bringing the station ad revenue, were all over the place with predictions. If you had a prediction of your own, they probably had a man or woman sharing your prognostication.

It's not necessarily a bad thing. If they say it looks like a blow-out, people might stay home, thinking their guy has a lock or no chance in hell. That's kinda human nature. You might drive by an accident and drive on thinking someone else will stop and help. OK. But, if everybody does that, nothing gets done. So, the networks- for the reason of ratings- do serve a purpose when they endeavor to call it close. They make people believe their vote is important, encourage people to get involved.

MSNBC was pretty confident Obama would win but, they cautioned it was going to be close and probably fought in the courts like 2000... Maybe they hoped? They're news junkies. That would be their nirvana. I get my Foxnews from Jon Stewart and Colbert so, I know they were promising a Rmoney victory of the landslide persuasion.

Stupid fuckers. I doubt that affected republican voter turn out but, I don't know that it didn't. I just think it's stupid to get too cocky before the game. They still have to play the game and you have to turn out.

On Election night, I Facebooked and watched a movie. Those first few hours of coverage are a lot of; "...with 1% of the vote's too close to call..." I don't need that when I can be sorta watching Matt Dillon chase bank robbers while joking with my friends. I turned on Jon Stewart, who was doing a live show, when I noticed that Ohio- which had been deemed THE most important state EVER in THIS election in the Power Rankings- had been called...FOR OBAMA!

What the? At 10:15??? I had been told by Chuck "Fucking" Todd that this would go on for days, weeks... because of Ohio. I mean- this was great but, what the what?

I switched over to MSNBC and they seemed as stunned as I. Happy but- what the what? Then word came out that Karl Rove was on Fox disputing the whole Ohio thing because it flew in the face of everything he had predicted and worked so hard for. And, ya know, that lasted about five minutes. The very spankable (but sadly crazy) Megyn Kelly walked through the studio and asked the numbers geeks at Fox if they were certain of the outcome in Ohio. Yes, yes they were. Perhaps Megyn isn't as crazy as I suspect because she returned, sat down with Rove and asked him if maybe this wasn't something he wanted to believe because he's a republican? OUCH!

Yours truly knew all along that Obama should win. We all know he had accomplished A LOT in his first four years and done it without ANY help from those awful republicans who had vowed to make him a one-term president, the moment he had won in '08. And, being a student of the game, I just couldn't see a fucking liar with NO plan other than undoing EVERYTHING his predecessor had done...on his first day and who actually said he could solve the economy in EIGHT TO TEN YEARS(!!!!) beating him. No way.

So, close, maybe. Close enough for them to cheat? Sure. But, we fell for that in '00 when the USSC 'decided' the election and that couldn't happen again. In '00, there was no incumbent. You screw around with this election with Obama in office and things would get ugly. Ugly could be spelled coup.Or Civil War?

So, turns out it wasn't all that close. Obama won by 2 million votes and like 128 Electoral College votes. Fox may not think that's a mandate (and they don't) but, it's TWO MILLION more votes than there guy got  in the popularity contest and a severe spanking in the EC. Bowl. It was a solid victory, indeed.

I knew Obama would win when I saw the long lines. People don't stand in a line for hours to vote for a guy who considers them the lazy, 47% and whose party made it so fucking necessary for them to stand in line to vote because most other forms of suppression had been shot down. No, they stand in line to vote for the man who deserves their vote and who isn't fucking with them.

The people have spoken and they were outstanding!

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Close encounters of the Bush kind

I was telling someone the other day that I don't hate George Bush. I didn't hate him in 2000 and I don't hate him now.

Perhaps worse than hate, I pity him. I see him as a fool. I believe that everything he did in his eight, horrible years as president was orchestrated by Dick Cheney and those around Dick Cheney. I'm certain George was stupid enough to think he was in charge, that he was POTUS and master and commander of all he ruled over. He was not. Thus, the pity.

In the early Eighties, I'm pretty sure I 'met' George Bush. I was a bartender at The Petroleum Club of New Orleans. One night, a Club member came in late with a couple of gentlemen. It was Mr. Killian. I knew it would be a much later night than I had figured on.

The Club was a unique bartending experience for me. It was a private club which really was only open for lunch and Club related banquets in the evening. A regular bunch of members played gin in a private room in the evenings and often deep into the next morning. I wasn't allowed to kick them out- no closing time- but, since they didn't really drink a whole lot, we did arrange to let them serve themselves on the honor system so myself and the manager could get on with our lives after ten pm. But, if there were members in the bar area, we had to stay until they were done.

Killian was one of those drunks that always asked for 'just one more'. After a bartender hears that from a guy, he knows knows that 'just one more' is code for, "I'm a drunk! I'll never leave! But, I want you to think I will!" Usually those types are trouble. They want to see how far they can push you. In later venues, seeing trouble on the rise and hearing those promissory words I'd take the wind out of a guys sails by cutting him off. Stunned, they generally turned to begging, pleading for just one more- like they really, really meant it this time...just one more...

When the cocaine came out, I knew it would be a long night. As I approached with just one more round of drinks, I noticed the lines on the table. Killian's guest, looked at me as if to say, "Duh". If he spoke to me, I don't recall. I'll just never forget that stupid, 'what-me-worry' look on his face....I would see it again, later in life, many, many times when a certain president was explaining stuff to us like wars and finances and shit he had just been informed of and we were the dumbasses just now being told.

Honestly, I don't know that it was him. We were never introduced. His daddy was Vice President of The United States at the time but, that never came up. I was young an nowhere near as politically astute as I am now. He was just some anonymous friend of Killian's, drinking, snorting coke and keeping me from going out and doing my own partying. But, it fit. Private club for oilmen. Bush was an oilman. He was known to party...monkey look on face..the eighties....I don't know....

One of the truly great things about New Orleans is strip clubs and hookers. Those were my saving grace that night. The Club was a nice place to booze it up on a tab and maybe do a little blow with no one around but a young, bored bartender but, if you want to show a Texas oilman a good time, Bourbon Street is better choice. Sooner rather than later, they were gone.

A brush with fame? Maybe. I might have caught him at a bad time and, again, it might not have been him. But, with the way he 'ran' the country, did we all catch him at a bad time? Before he became president, George cleaned up his act and quit the booze and coke. Good for him. Can you imagine the mischief he could have gotten into in the White House if he was jacked up on coke and booze? Yikes.

Maybe I don't hate the guy because I might have seen him once being a regular guy. Lot's of people say he was the kind of president you could have a beer with. Well, if he hadn't fucked up and become an alcoholic, that is. He had that 'regular knucklehead' thing going for him.

That's why I don't hate the guy despite his war and financial  crimes. He's an idiot but never has been an in-control idiot. Mitt Rmoney is an in-control idiot. And an asshole. Win or lose, I hate that fucker. I wouldn't even serve that fuckin' prick a cup of coffee.

I think that life after the White House has forced Bush to look back on his two terms, with that deer in the headlights look from reading "My Pet Goat" after 9/11 and caused him to wonder what the hell happened as he sat, stunned, waiting to be told what to do. The defining moment of his presidency.

I'm sure Bush is glad he's out of the spotlight. Glad that, except for a mention by his brother, they do not speak of him at conventions they won't even invite him to. That might hurt a bit but, he must secretly be glad to be left alone. However, he's alone to ponder his eight years and how they affected an entire nation whether he knew it at the time or not. Who knows if he cares? He's not talking. Well, except for a speaking engagement in the Cayman's (where Rmoney keeps his loot) and he'll be addressing rich men whom he likely made richer...

Sheesh, maybe I should hate the sumbitch. Anyway, I'm way ahead on hating Rmoney!

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Power To The People?

If you are going to be without power, summer is a pretty good time for this. On the East coast, it's still pretty much Fall so, things could be worse. Most hurricanes happen in warm weather in warm climes and, as much as they suck, once the winds pass and you can wade through flood waters in shorts and a tee-shirt, you can get on with rebuilding your life.

My personal record of 12 days without electricity happened in July several years ago. Air conditioning is one of those luxuries you really miss when it's gone, in Memphis,in July. But, you deal with it. You go outside and catch a breeze. Why be inside? There's no TV or internet. I'm gonna have to say, it wasn't that bad. My job was in Mississippi at the time. They hadn't been hit as hard by the 100 mph straight-line winds as Memphis had so they were very quickly back on line with power. I could gas up, buy cold beer, food and ice to bring home each day. A buddy of mine lived in an oddly blessed part of town that had not lost power then or during a nasty ice storm a few years earlier and I could shower at his place, charge up the phone and look at the wonder of television. That helped. For the most part though, friends and neighbors all in the same boat, sweated and drank beer each evening, wondering when the power would return. It really was a fun time, all things considered.

The folks in Jersey and up and down the East Coast are making the best of a far worse situation though and I doubt they are having too much fun. Hurricane Sandy has been all over the news. Hurricane Elvis that year in Memphis barely got a mention outside of the Mid-South. I would have thought that a city the size of Memphis, with more than 80% of it's citizens without power for days to nearly two weeks might garner more notice than a paragraph in Time magazine but, I'd be wrong. The storm sucked and did A LOT of damage but, nowhere near the death and devastation of Sandy, which, right now stands at 80 dead and 60 BILLION in damages. Yikes!

I wasn't in Memphis for the ice storm but, trying to stay warm in a disaster is far more of a challenge. I did some work for a fella whose treed lot I admired.

"You wouldn't have wanted to be here for the ice storm," he said. "Every crack of a tree in the wind..."

I could imagine. I would have gotten the hell out of the house though, somewhere- anywhere- without ice-laden tree branches overhead. They made it through.

Everything has to be politicized these days. That's the way it is, with all politics being local, Mittens Rmoney can't escape the videotape of him calling for the privatization of FEMA and emergency care. Surprisingly... he recently came off of that stance and now claims that, as CEO of America, he will support FEMA.

No shit. That must be painful for him to say. $60 BILLION in damages equals many, many more BILLIONS in profits for his buddies! By the by, I don't think private emergency companies would actually be running around with credit card swipers, rescuing only distressed folks with an ability to pay, as some foresee. Those job-creating heroes will be billing the FEDERAL AND STATE GOVERNMENTS for their services and you WILL pay for it in taxes. You'll just sleep better at night (if you're of the republican persuasion) knowing that someone is making money off of this and we're that much further away from socialism. Praise the Lord!

Still, I think there will be some of the tier packaging of emergency services that we've already seen in rural areas. If you don't pay your monthly fire department bill in Tennessee for example, the Fire Department will show up to watch your house burn. While there, they will keep the fire from spreading to your neighbors house IF he paid his bill. I talked with a kid who lived outside of Little Rock, Arkansas. His local Police Department has a similar set-up. They refused to come out to his home after a burglary because he was in arrears. They did show up later that week to see if he was ready to pay.

This tea party notion of a nation will surely be a brave new world of survival, eh? Oddly expensive too. I wonder what a President/CEO Rmoney would really do with lesser performing states and citizens. Good god, let's not find out! There could be a lot of storms in our future...

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

'Tis the season!

I decorated my house and noticed that right after I did so, three neighbors across the street all decided to decorate too! This afternoon I walked around the neighborhood to see if others had gotten as caught up in the season as I and my neighbors had. The day is approaching and I was curious as to who else might have gotten off to a late start on decorating. And, yes, I wanted to see how scared I should be.

Not too scary. There were only a few Rmoney signs!

HA! I tricked you! You thought I was writing about Halloween! BOO!

Really, it's fairly telling. The three neighbors across the street did put their Rmoney signs out right after the Ferrerman 'Obama' sign went out in the front yard. So, I started it. They were probably going to vote for Rmoney anyway and weren't waiting to do the opposite of Ferrerman but, ya never know. But, other folks in the extended neighborhood don't know Ferrerman and probably didn't follow my lead, pro or con. In my travels today, I didn't see a lot of either candidate's signs. I think there were definitely a lot more in '08.

I don't see that as apathy. At least in this 'burb, I think people are confused. Politics will confuse the shit out of you if you don't know much about it. It'll confuse the shit out of you if you know too much as well. You can hear so much bad about Obama (or any candidate) and neither know or care if it's true. People are doing pretty well here and might be thinking this one is no big deal, at least not the big deal it was in '08 after eight years of the Bush carnage. There was "Hope and Change" promised by a wonderful young man from Chicago and, the reality is, he delivered. He delivered against seemingly insurmountable odds. A lesser man would have picked a ball o' fluff from Alaska and phoned in his candidacy. An even lesser man is currently trying to get elected telling lies and promising to undo absofuckinglutely everything Obama has done.

I can see how more mainstream republicans might not be terribly excited about their candidate this time around. Never minding what I think about him, it doesn't seem that they like him. If these people were afraid of the black man four years ago, they're not afraid of him now. He's worked out pretty good.  Nor are they excited by the billionaire who endeavours to inexplicably shake the Etch A Sketch clean by wiping out the last four years and starting over. You seriously have to ask yourself, "Why?"

It's only "job-killing Obamacare" if you're a republican congressman or an idiot troll who posts on Topix. Thirty million more people cannot be denied healthcare now. It's a big fucking deal, to borrow a phrase. Same with ending the war in Iraq if you're in either of those camps. If you think that Obama thinks he personally killed Bin Laden and then spiked the ball and did a political dance about it- like those black guys do in football...then you're in those camps. One MILLION jobs were saved with his bailout of GM and Chrysler. That was one million jobs and the blood, sweat and tears LIVES that go along with them, at the height of the depth of the worst recession since The Great Depression. Another big, fucking deal. There were more. You get the idea.

Obviously, people on Topix don't. Mittens sounds like he wants to be president of them although, in reality, he wouldn't walk across the street to give them a haircut or try and recruit them to his church. He's only courting their vote because- gosh darnit- they're allowed to vote. He doesn't care about them. They are not in his percentage whether they are the 47% or the 53%. They are not the one percent. Neither are my neighbors, immediate or extended, no matter how well they are doing. If you're part of the Dow crowd, you must notice that it's going great despite the Muslim communist leading the country with his fascist/socialist healthcare and his being OK with gay folks dying for their country. So, why change horses in mid-stream?

I don't think this election is as close as the polls and pundits say it is. Sure, the idiots in Washington and the idiots on Topix hate Obama and have every reason under the sun to want him gone. But, they were like that before he got elected so, I sense a pattern. Polls mean nothing but what pollsters want them to mean. It's old school politics to keep your candidate in the game, by keeping your voters interested. In this case, believing  it's close will also inspire Obama fans to vote. I believe they will. There may be apathy in the suburban front yards this time around but, I think people will turn out to vote and make the right choice. It's still a big fucking deal.

Oh- there seemed to be more Halloween displays than in previous years. That might mean something too.

And my Obama sign? The one that inspired the neighbors to get politically active? It blew away!

Or some rat bastard republican stole it....

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Irony- Thy Name Is Rmoney!

As dedicated non-readers, you all know I absolutely love irony. And, I like politics. So, it follows that I would just love the irony of politics!

I do. It seems that everything our opposition in this country has slammed our president for, they could slam their own candidate for. Neat, eh?

Mitt Rmoney's dad was born in Mexico, a country largely considered by those outside of Mexico to be a foreign country. Though Mitten's is clearly White, his daddy was Mexican born. Republicans can dismiss this based on his obvious whiteness and note that the only reason George Romney was born in Mexico was because his father was forced to abandon America so he could have several wives- a practice which was FROWNED UPON in this establishment known as America, at the time. Still is.

But, IRONY ALERT! they still make a big deal about Obama's father having been Kenyan.

Obama is also a suspected Muslim. Still. And we wouldn't want someone with a weird religion running the country, would we?

Willard Mittens Rmoney is a Mormon. Though he rarely talks in appearances about this, he is a confessed Mormon!

The irony here is that mainstream Christian religions consider the Mormons to be a "cult". This means they don't like Mormons. It's not the Crips v. Bloods kinda thing but, they do consider Mormons to be a rival gang to be watched very closely. I cannot fathom that the same folks who make up the base of the GOP would want a guy who was a Bishop in this cult to lead them in Washington. Among their millions of faithful they couldn't find ONE guy who was Baptist (and born in this country) to run for POTUS??? They had a chance with Santorum...but, he turned out to be a Catholic.

Never minding religion, in 2008 a huge deal was made about Barack Obama never having served in the military like his opponent, John McCain, had. Obama had never successfully crashed planes or been captured by the enemy, the republican qualifications for POTUS, at the time.

IRONY ALERT! Rmoney spent two years of prime Vietnam service time serving as a missionary for his church. The rest of his time he had college deferments.

FULL DISCLOSURE: Barack Obama used grade school deferments to avoid the draft for Vietnam. So did I.

Somehow, the war-hawkish GOP overlooks this, this time around yet manages to point out that Obama never served! Younger than Mittens, this puts him in a six way tie with Rmoney's five sons who, not being eligible for a draft (there isn't one) did not feel the need to evade or serve. They did however complete missions for their church- something Barack H. Obama never did! So, suddenly, one man's lack of service is not important but, the other man's is. That's some irony that I shall not even bother to put in bold print. It's just fucking stupid.

And finally, at least for this purpose, there is the irony that Rmoney is considered to be a "businessman" while  Obama is not.

Well, their is no Rmoney Incorporated that one can drive by and say: "He built that!" You can't talk about your uncle or neighbor that works at Rmoney Inc. making...things...that you'll find in nearly every American household. Rmoney's Mexican dad made cars but, his son made money out of other people's misery and used other people's money to do it. The only jobs he created were overseas where, coincidentally, he also keeps his millions of dollars. His old 'company'- Bain Capital, outsourced jobs. They were and still are very good at it. (See: Sensata, in Freeport Il. But, hurry! They're having a 'Going-out-of-the-country sale, ironically, the day before the election.)

So, lots of irony here! More than I can detail. It's quite possible the irony will be on us, November 7th.

Now, that's some fucking irony, eh? Well, I did try to alert you all.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Imagine hairy voters

Imaginary people of the republican persuasion on the internet are quick to point out that Barack Obama did NOT physically kill Osama Bin Laden. Oh. Well, OK, no one of the democratic persuasion has actually claimed that he had. It would seem kinda stupid to say that he had. Yet they say this, a lot.

Well, people are kinda stupid. You may have noticed this. Imaginary people on the internet come from the same stupid portion of the population where Indiana or Missouri congressmen come from, who have stupid ideas about rape and the birthing of babies under absolutely any circumstances. They poop in their pants, stumble over thoughts and their own feet just like non-internet idiots do.

And evidently, they vote!


Anybody who is 'undecided' at this point in the election is an idiot. Their opinion should not matter. But, it does.

It's storming! There's shelter over there. Do I go to the shelter or wait to see if the lightning gets me? Someone could come along with an umbrella. They might have sandwiches too. What if the sandwiches are soggy? Is there any place to sit inside or will I have to stand? What if there's a hole in the roof? I might get wet anyway...

Fucking-stupid-idiots! Sheesh- at least with reichtards you can see and hear their idiotic, hateful racism and- goddamn their asshole selves- at least they have a motherfucking opinion! Amazing but, that counts for something.

Maybe the undecideds are just undecided in hopes of getting on CNN and maybe getting discovered by a producer and becoming a movie star?

I saw you on CNN. You are just what I'm looking for! I need someone to play a beating victim in my next film. For realism, we're going to use actual baseball bats and actually kill you. Would you be OK with that?

Um, will the bats be aluminum or wood? I'm concerned about the environment...

The cable news folks keep saying that this election will be decided by undecided voters. One poll said that the typical undecided voter was a female, 18-29, with a low-income job and very little interest in politics. Yeah, sure. Let's let our nation's highest office be decided by Muffy . However the knuckleheads they parade after the debates do not reflect that demographic. They tend to look like your neighbors. Well, you know how stupid they are...

Undecideds should probably not be confused with independents. Those people are like bisexuals. They may be thinking : "Dick? Or pussy?" all the time but they will make up their minds. Undecideds eventually might too. They just won't know why. It won't be based on any deep thought or personal conviction. Maybe a coin toss?

Oh shit! Heads...or tails...what it it lands on it's edge....

And independents tend to simply be non-committal types  who like people to think they are free of party lines and maybe bolder and smarter than everyone else. Maybe one or five are. The others, just may like dick AND pussy. Good for them, I guess. They double their chances for weekend fun

Sigh. Every election is like this so, it's nothing new. That same guy in front of you at McDonald's trying to figure out the Dollar Menu will wind up in a voting booth, the first Tuesday in November, and ponder that at the last moment too. Like it's so fucking hard...

I can't wait until it's over. Some people are just getting started...