Tuesday, July 30, 2013


McDonalds workers in New York City are striking, asking for a hike in wages from the fast food average of $8.94 to a more livable $15 an hour. Wendy's and Burger King workers are also involved. Walmart workers have done this as well.

Wow- doesn't that seem like a HUGE jump in pay!?  For most minimum wage workers, that would be DOUBLING their pay! Is that fair to McDonalds? How can even a multi-billion dollar organization afford that?

When yours truly had minimum wage eligible jobs in high school, waaaay back in the 20th century, the minimum wage was $1.60 an hour. Believe me, that was pretty good in early 1970's dollars. Gas was like 30 cents a gallon, smokes were @.50 a pack, a burger/fries/and shake at one of the above places would maybe be a dollar? I don't remember all the prices. But, that was the minimum wage. Grown ups at other jobs were making more. In fact, the minimum of $7.25 now, was about what I would make as a non-union painter, a few years later when I was about 21. The union guys I worked with made $13 an hour. That was good money that you could make a mortgage and car payment with. My pay wasn't chopped liver either!

It is insane that 30-40 years later that minimum is only $7.25 and fucking obscene that the monied powers that be want to eliminate the minimum!

The actual workers believe they need twice the minimum to survive and the people forced to pay them the minimum believe they need to pay less. Where's the happy medium? By the way, economists tend to agree that, to keep pace with today's dollars/inflation, the minimum wage should be $21 an hour. Fifteen is pretty much a bargain!

The representatives of the corporations- the republican party- say that the minimum wage holds workers back. They say this with straight faces. In the free market... they say straight-faced...no minimum wage would mean that you the worker could command more based on your skills. I think they are confused about what minimum might actually mean. They might be confusing it with maximum. Well, unless less really is more, that is.

I'm paraphrasing some comedian here but, the minimum wage is your boss telling you: "I want to pay you less but, the government won't let me! I would pay you less, if only I could!!"

The corporate spinmeisters (GOP again) are trying to tell us that your boss is saying: "I want to pay you more but, the government won't let me! I can only pay you more if they remove the MINIMUM of what I HAVE to pay you!"

Well, if you put it that way....it makes even less sense. In fact, it's stupid and insultingly so. McDonalds and Walmart DO NOT want to pay their workers more. Even that idiotic, fanciful *budget* that they put out for their workers assumed one had a second minimum wage job and still didn't need to heat one's home. That they might pay a dollar over the minimum doesn't mean much when few hourly employees get near the 40 hours to be eligible for benefits. It's well known that thousands of Walmart employees are eligible for welfare as are millions of similarly employed people. Want to get people off the taxpayer dole? Pay a living wage! I read recently that Walmart having to pay the living wage of $15 an hour would increase the costs of your purchases at Walmart by 53 cents. Not $.53 on the dollar. FIFTY THREE CENTS for the whole fucking  basket! The horror.

Greed, for lack of a better word, sucks. I'm paraphrasing again. This is all about greed. On the threads today was an article about how millionaires- those that just technically qualify- are not really all that well off.  One Topix teabagger of note, who shall not be mentioned because he is litigious and can sue people for free, said that a million bucks today was not like it was in the fifties. If he was a millionaire, he would need a lot more security that that! Indeed. Back in '08 I remember Fox *news* discussing how Obama's plan to tax folks making $250k or more was bad because $250,000 a year was not really a lot of money. They interviewed people who were in that bracket. They talked about how tough it was for a family of four to get by. It seems to me that in the Clinton era, the same thing was said about trying to get by on $100,000 a year. Sigh...

Did you see the pattern there? The minimum standard for wealth has gone up- and people find it tough to get by on that. Just since Bill Clinton was in office, it's risen from $100,000 to a million. And those fuckers are crying! And they are crying hardest about the folks at the bottom rung of life's ladder, wanting to climb up a rung and not giving a moments thought to how hard it might be to get by in life at $7.25 an hour. They own the entire forest but, believe they are one tree away from becoming a desert. You are that one tree in their way. Mcfuck 'em!

Friday, July 26, 2013

The "DO NOT Stand Your Ground" Law

Ever see an episode of COPS? You could get pretty wasted if you had a drinking game based around suspects explaining (once caught) that they ran because they were scared. It's a reoccurring theme,

Under the DO NOT Stand Your Ground law, a suspect could run slap outa  his shoes  and, when caught, explain that he ran because he was scared and the cop would have to- according to the law- understand that. Likewise, so would a jury if the case ever got that far.

Let's face it: If you just committed a crime, the last person you want to see is a cop! You see one, you get scared, and you...RUN! Duh!

Hey- I'm a middle-aged man and while driving, if I spot a cop behind me, I feel like I'm 17 and I got some weed on me. Don't you?  I mean, no weed or any illegal substances on us but we feel guilty.

And scared.

So, in these circumstances, who can blame me if I just put the pedal to the metal and just take off like a bat out of Hell?  "I was scared, officer..."

"That's why I ran over those people crossing the street, officer...."

Life itself is pretty scary at times. What if people broke out running or driving any time they were *afraid* . Well, as a natural extension to the Stand Your Ground law which says you have the right to use deadly force if you feel your life is in danger or you fear bodily harm, we should have a law that says it's OK to run if you're scared, because, it makes perfect sense to run if you are scared! DUH! Cats know this. It's perfectly natural for them to wake up from one of their hundreds of naps in a day and just bolt into another room. You could ask them why but, they're cats, ya know... Chances are, they are afraid. Aren't we all?

Well, I gotta run! Not literally, mind you. I ain't skeered!

Should I be?

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Tabitha Zimmerman


The jury found George Martin "not guilty" in the killing of Tabitha Zimmerman! According to jury instructions, which read verbatim the Stand Your Ground law, the jury found that George Martin feared for his life and was justified in killing 17 year old, Tabitha Zimmerman.

George's version of that night was that he spotted an attractive blonde girl, clad only in tight short shorts and a tank top, walking through the neighborhood with a bag of Skittles (candy) and a can of Arizona Ice Tea. She was "up to no good". He said: "Those sluts...they always get away..." He began to follow her...

According to George, he stopped following her and was returning to his SUV when Tabitha attacked him. There were no witnesses to that but, a neighbor did testify that he saw Tabitha on top of George, fighting him. Tabitha's friend testified that Tabitha had told her on the phone that a "...creepy, old man..." was following her, possibly to rape her. George Martin had called 911 to report her being in the neighborhood. On the 911 recording of the call, someone is heard screaming for help but, it wasn't clear if the voice screaming belong to the teenage girl or George Martin.

The story made headlines mostly because it hadn't made headlines. Under Florida's Stand Your Ground" law, George Martin hadn't even been arrested by the police. He had been taken into custody  but only for the most perfunctory of investigations. Determining he met the criteria for SYG, they let him go without charges.

Tabitha's parents, having lost a daughter, were outraged that so little had been done in the investigation of their daughters death. In no time, Women's Rights advocates became involved. This caused Fox news to question why, in this post gender society, "Everything STIll had to be about gender?"  We had had a female Secretary Of State, for godssake! As far as Fox and many reichwingers were concerned, this was simply a case of self defense.

Though Tabitha hadn't broken any laws that night, millions of people on the internet were convinced she was intending to break laws that night. She had smoked marijuana in the past and also been suspended from school! There had, after all, been break ins in the neighborhood, and attractive, teenage girls had been seen in the vicinity at the time. And, of course, being an attractive, young woman, people were sure she had "led him on..." That's what they do, the internet said.

Famous women and men took up the cause. People wore short shorts and tank tops and carried signs that said: "I AM TABITHA ZIMMERMAN". Curiously they were all known liberal women like Oprah and Ellen and men like Sean Penn and Michael Moore.

This caused Fox and Rush Limbaugh to question why this was a gender issue. Indeed. Why wasn't it simply an issue of someone killing someone who made them fear for their life? The law didn't specify white men killing teenaged white women. George Martin, doing his *job* as a Neighborhood Watch Person, feared for his life from the young woman who, on the internet at least, was 6'4" and 250 pounds even though she was actually of average height and weight.

Well, Tabitha must have seemed that big while she was beating George's ass that night but she was just a typical teenage girl. In the end, the bottom line was as it was presented to the jury. They felt that, George Martin feared for his life and therefore, met the stringent criteria of the SYG law that they had been instructed to follow by the court- "Did he fear for his life?"

Well, yeah! Golly, I would! Who wouldn't?

The legal system had not asked them if they thought George Martin was an overzealous idiot who took the law into his own hands and murdered a teenage girl because she got the better of him in a fight. It's all in how you ask the question, in court. The law loves yes or no answers because nothing highlights the rainbow of life's questions like black or white answers.

Did I say "black or white"? I don't know how race got into this. Sorry 'bout that! Please don't be scared...this couldn't really happen, right? I'll just need a yes or a no on that. Thanks! You are free to go!

Saturday, July 20, 2013

Skittles in hand


Had any of these people smoked weed or had trouble in school? You know, I don't recall anybody asking at the time. All had reason to be in the theater that night- the Batman movie. But, no one knows where they were going next and what they might do. Some may have had Skittles in their possession. And hoodies? In Colorado in July? Maybe but, not really likely.

I just don't recall anyone suggesting they deserved to die for any reason. The people on Foxnews or Topix didn't think about weed or academic records being grounds for the death penalty here. Odd, but in this case, they actually blamed the shooter rather than the victim!

And then there was Newton...

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

The Color Of Justice

Assholes continue to rejoice over the victory of Zimmerman v. Martin. I think that their only disappointment is that the law won't allow them to dig up Trayvon Martin's body so that Zimmerman may shoot him again. Well, there is always the post trial public lynching. Kinda odd that it's the victim who is getting lynched this time.

Well, not really. The racists really came out for this one. I'm surprised that the riots they predicted weren't victory riots like white people tend to do after Stanley Cup and NBA championships.

Of course the usual idiots in the threads are running their fingers about how guilty Trayvon was, how deserving of death his pot-smoking, class-cutting self was. We knew they would, win, lose or draw.

The death penalty for pot may seem a little strict- especially from a conservative viewpoint. It's like, HELLO- pot smokers are what privatized prisons are for!!

But, there are people out there who truly believe Trayvon Benjamin Martin needed killing. Six women in Florida actually came to that conclusion in a legal sort of way. They served as jury, after the fact, to Zimmerman's judge and executioner.

I'm so fucking tired of hearing how this wasn't about race. It so clearly was. Not too deep inside, conservatives are sad that George Zimmerman isn't 100% white. Trayvon fit the black-bill quite nicely but, Zimmerman is part Peruvian. Really that helps the NOT about race bullshit but, you know they wanted John Wayne to do this. They just did.

The only way it couldn't be about race was if Zimmerman had been black or Martin and him had both been white. See, if you are really all about self defense and standing your ground you need to be good with killing a white child. You need to be good with someone killing your own kid under the same circumstances. You need to go on Topix or elsewhere on the 'net and praise your child's killer for defending himself.

The Stand Your Ground laws do not specify only the standing of ground against and killing of blacks. So far, our laws don't work that way. They may be interpreted that way but, they don't literally SAY that. Yet...

With the likes of the American Legislative Exchange Counsel (ALEC) and the NRA writing many of our laws at the state level these days, it might be a matter of time before they get race specific. We'll see. They wrote the SYG laws. They wrote them with an unwritten agenda. That agenda became clear this past week, in Florida. The good people of America (and the world!) are outraged by this. The assholes of America are thrilled. They just haven't thought this all the way through. They'll think again when some white guy shoots Johnny Appleby because he feared for his life. Legally, that could happen... Legally, that hero should walk...

We will see about that, doncha know?

Sunday, July 14, 2013

All things being equal...

Thank the Lord that, in this post-racial society that the murder of Trayvon Martin was not at all about race! Nope, it was clearly about how, if a grown, sorta white man stalks and picks a fight with a black teenager- and begins to lose- he can pull his pistol and kill the child! Samuel Colt did make all men equal after all!

You see, America, this wasn't about a close to being white guy getting away with murder, killing a black kid. In this post racial society of ours (i'll remind you that we have a black President) that's not even possible anymore. George Zimmerman could easily have stalked a white kid and murdered him.

Well, our law is based largely on precedent. I'm sure people who are whooping it up now because Zimmerman was acquitted would whoop just as hard if Zimmerman had killed their own child under the exact circumstances. In fact, the same assholes who (really) believe Trayvon Martin deserved to die be cause he was a teenager who had smoked weed, would love to have the same justice meted out to their own progeny.

Oh- your kid doesn't smoke weed? That's what murder trials are for. Surprise! Your kid is a doper! AND, a doper who deserved to die....

And, like a rape victim, what your child was wearing will be a mitigating factor in his death. You should have thought about that hoodie. It's the low-cut blouse of the new millennium.

If the hero who put your child out of society's misery goes to trial (because of fucking whiners...whining...) you will not provide nice pictures of him for the media because that would be unfair. You would only provide pictures where your kid is making angry faces or posing like a gangster. No one should think of your child as an innocent victim. 

Every aspect of your child's life will be put out there for Topixtards and the other dregs of society to pour over and determine reason for death. Most of this crap won't make it into the courtroom because many of our courts still operate under the rule of law but, so much of it will be out there to taint any jury pool in the country.

But, you're good with that. You're good with that because you are good with the fucked up verdict that happened last night. Same scenario but, your white kid. Fuck it- make Zimmerman a white Baptist. Same scenario. HE KILLS YOUR KID.

You are good with that. It is justice. 

Well, you said so last night...

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Why is this news?

Like a lot of people with brains, I have a bad feeling about the impending verdict in the Zimmerman murder trial. They are confiscating tampons and maxi-pads in a courthouse in Texas while allowing firearms. The world seems more insane by the minute.

There's a lot going on in this country and in the world but, if you watch the news right now, only the Zimmerman murder trial seems to be of importance. This causes consternation with a lot of people. Why isn't there constant coverage of the coup in Egypt? Young black men are murdering each other everyday in Chicago- why isn't that a bigger story than  George Zimmerman murdering ONE black teenager? And how about the Benghazi and IRS scandals? The media hardly talks about those two any more, a clear indication that Barack Obama controls the media! Right?

No, Obama is the President Of The United States, not network programming. If you have a problem with what is or isn't news, consult your local network president. He will probably consult his corporate benefactors, i.e. advertisers.

Walter Cronkite is dead. The nightly news was buried with him, I guess. It's entertainment now. Entertainment is business. Up through the 70's the nightly network news was more of a programming obligation than a money-maker. Someone can correct me if i'm wrong (or troll me, right or wrong...) but, I think the news was an FCC mandate. Probably still is. The networks and affiliates were bound by the FCC to present one half hour of public service news programming every day. They finally figured out that, though they had to do it, they could make money at it. It takes money to make money so, they pumped money into sets and anchormen and went about looking for stories that would draw the most interest, in the most viewers. That is the programming of real life. There can't always be plane crashes and hurricanes but, in a big country and world like we have, there is always some entertaining shit going on.

So, a sorta white guy murdering an unarmed black teen he was following- for no good reason- is big news because, he'll probably get away with it. And it's big news because, at first, it was barely news at all. In fact, Zimmerman, the cops initially let Zimmerman go, probably with a pat on the back because of who he was and who he killed. He = reasonably white guy and captain of the Neighborhood Watch Program. Trayvon Martin = black teen. Need I say more?

Well, yes, I need...

Florida has a Stand Your Ground law that essentially says that gun owners don't have to run and hide if attacked. They can stand their ground and use deadly force. So, that night, in the opinion of investigating officers, based on the SYG law, Zimmerman was within the law. So, he was free to go.

So, why was this news, you ask? Well, opinions vary but, some people think that Trayvon's parents (also black) got all uppity and started whining to any black people who would listen (pretty much all of them) that their son had been murdered and nothing was being done about it. Despite a law saying it was OK for George Zimmerman to kill the kid, the kids parents were still bitching! Except for that, this wouldn't have ever gone to trial.

Long story short, they got some media attention and, here we are today, awaiting a verdict in a case that some people think should never have gone to trial.

Thank the media for that. Just don't thank them too much. They made this a story. It shouldn't have been a national story. When a life is taken there should be far, far more than a perfunctory investigation and look at some feel good law with a shrug of legal shoulders as if one is code enforcement and looking at a home being built with the minimum standards. 

Ironic but, Stand Your Ground is a cowardly law. The cowardice is on the part of the candy-assed legislators who pass such unnecessary, feel-good legislation. I think Zimmerman is a coward too. He brought a gun to a fist fight and got whupped by a kid and murdered that kid. That's at best. At worst he murdered a kid he didn't know, just because he could.

SYG is on trial here whether the powers that be acknowledge it or not. If Zimmerman *wins* is this a test case for open season on black youth? If he loses, will Florida and other states revisit SYG laws?

They should. Ironic that- concerning guns- republicans and their military arm, The NRA, are always saying we don't need new laws, we should just ignore the laws already on the books. Well, that's what they mean. In every state in the Union, you are allowed to kill anybody who is trying to kill you. It's always been this way. It's only in the last 10- 20 years that it's been encouraged. What the fuck did anybody think concealed carry would mean? Clearly, in CCW states, you can use deadly force to defend your life. SYG just means little or no paperwork. There should be paperwork! There should be accountability! Maybe that smacks of the BIG GOVERNMENT that I and so many liberals love so much or, maybe it just means that taking a person's life is a very serious act and, should not be taken lightly. You take a man's last breath, you better have a good reason. There will be paperwork.

The media accidentally got this one right. They are definitely selling t-shirts and souvenir mugs at this point but, they got the public to the point where millions cared that Trayvon Benjamin Martin lived AND died. All his parents and loved one's wanted was that George Zimmerman be forced to answer for killing their boy. If you think about it, you would want that too. Wouldn't you?

Thursday, July 11, 2013

The Topix Troll Protection Program

Longtime, dedicated non-readers know that the poster formerly known as Angelique770 has been stalking me for five years now. Her minions deny that, citing that there is no longer a registered poster, Angelique770, there never could have been.

I may have mentioned before that some of these people hide like three year old's. They close their eyes and you can't see them.

Angelique770's original profile has gone through many, many changes over the years. She has been Chiarra, Annabella and several others, all from the same account. We're not talking socks here where anybody with an email address can become a new profile. This is the same profile and user, changing names. I recall reading that Topix allowed this if a person "had a good reason". Then I recalled who had posted that. It was one of Angelique770's socks! She was explaining why her name had changed. She was being stalked...probably by a Ferrerman....and Topix had changed her profile....to protect the innocent.... You will notice this on old threads where the original profile name is still in replies from other posters though the avatar has changed. I haven't noticed anyone but Angelique having done this.

Sheesh! Think about that from a Topix perspective. If they allowed people to willy-nilly change their profiles, they would be inundated with posters wanting to do that. Some would want to do it on an hourly basis! Maybe post to post. From a puffing up the post count standpoint, it would cost them money. As far as advertisers know, Kevin (for example) really is two or three hundred different people. Same with a Bex or anybody else who has a sock drawer full of personalities. (Ferrerman's note: Copping a plea to having 4 or 5 socks *proves* that is ALL you've got! You wouldn't lie, would you?)

So, as I and others have suspected for a long time, Angelique works for Topix. Her job would be to, perhaps, organize consortium's of posters to promote as much posting as possible, anyway she saw fit. Sounds like a business plan to me!

I'm trying to be nice here. It's every bit as likely that she is a 300 pound, retired longshoreman named "Lou" whose only joy in life is trolling people on Topix. Which image do you prefer? One makes as much sense as the other.

Back in the day, when I was first posting on Topix in the Chicago Forum, I posted quite a bit with "The Regulars" of the time. I was asked to join the offshore Yahoo accounts where they posted stories and chatted and whatever. I say "and whatever" because I don't know because I didn't join. I was just getting used to Topix and the internet itself and I wasn't interested in secret societies. And, honestly, I've got that Groucho Marx thing going on where I wouldn't want to join any club that would have me as a member. I've also got his walk but, that's a story for another day.

Frankly, though I thought it harmless at the time, I didn't buy her therapist act. I thought it was bullshit. She would drop some Psych 101 observations into discussions of Amy/Abby letters (which the regulars feasted upon each day)  and it was pretty easy stuff. I wondered why she bothered or had the time. Well, she explained, she was (then) teaching psychology and this was something she could do between classes. She begged off of personal analysis of someone's dilemma in life because, well, she wasn't there to give it away after all!

Oh, sounded like teachable moments to me....TEACHER...

She also didn't believe in love, writing off every romantic relationship in the history of the world as a PEA Haze", some psychobabble about chemicals and yada yada so, love, from a clinical standpoint, was but a chemical reaction and not love, actually. Or maybe she was talking about boners and got confused?

Therapist? No. Teacher? No. I don't know what she was but it was easy to see she wasn't a therapist or teacher of fledgling therapists. Such stretching of truth is typical on the internet and you kinda sigh and read on past the war heroes and millionaires to get to the rest of the story. You have to admit, fake therapist shows some creativity. Although, combat VETERAN fake therapist would be really cool...

Anyhoo, A770 did not appreciate Ferrerman calling her out on the therapist thing. I found her to be manipulative of people and I didn't like that but, trying to manipulate me was something I was against most of all. After a period of sparring on the threads, she mentioned (offshore...) to the ladies that, a couple of months earlier...Ferrerman....had sent her a picture of his penis...(and THAT had slipped her mind????!!!) and, well...what did the rest of the gals think about that...?

How long does one have to go college and grad school before they might think to mention to their girlfriends- when it happens- that a guy they all know sent her a picture of his naughty bits? Every woman I know in the real world would be on that in a heartbeat. Some would call the police. If the sender was an NFL quarterback, some would call TMZ. None would wait two months until the guy had fallen out of favor of the group and then mention that, by the way....

I covered this bullshit in the beginning of this blog and am just highlighting it for new and or lazy, dedicated non-readers. I bring it up now because I think this might be a Topix employee that has been hounding me all this time. She's doing business as a hundred plus versions of the name "Sue" now but, though she disavows any knowledge of Angelique770 or the Chicago Regulars, she is old friends with Sublime1 from that forum. They know all the stories of dick pics and any (and then some) gossip about custody issues I may or may not have had while married, long ago and far away but, they don't know who A770 was and if I'm thinking that she's any of the various Sue's, well then i'm wrong about that. Maybe Sublime1, who is a lawyer, can sue me for that too. Alert readers may notice that Sublime1 is a common thread here. Maybe he's the one feeding Topix readers gossip about Ferrerman's personal life? I should sue him! I'll call a divorce lawyer to handle his patent attorney ass because I want this bitch out of my life and I figure that's what divorce lawyers do! Right?

For all I know he is Angelique770.

But, I'm not saying that. And i'm not saying that Topix would knowingly hire people who would stalk people in their real lives for the purpose of punching up their post count. That they would hire people who lie for that same purpose about pictures of people's genitals and such. I'm not saying they hire people to DO all that. They might hire people to do that but, i'm not saying that.

I guess I'm saying they might hire people who DO do that at the worst and, very likely at the best they hire people who allow others to do all that.

Yep, that is what I am saying. It sure seems this way...

Monday, July 8, 2013

Heaven Knows, Mr. Ferrerman

Naked And Afraid. I tuned in thinking it would be the story of my freshman year gym class but, I was way wrong! It's actually about two people, a man  and a woman, dropped off in an exotic but dangerous locale with nothing but a camera crew. And by nothing I mean, they are buck naked! 

Last night's episode took place on a deserted island in The Maldives (I think) which is somewhere in Google and looks exotic but seems south of Hell as far as sun and heat goes.

The guy was a tall, strapping ex-Marine (Force Recon/sniper) who had been on missions all over the world. You think this would be a day at the beach for a guy with that sort of resume. But, you'd be wrong because the USMC never sent this fair-skinned fella out naked and without sunscreen. This poor man practically caught fire in the first hour. If you've ever had sunburn...his was far worse.

The young lady was a surfer girl, technically from Hawaii but, described as a sort of citizen of the world as she had never been in school and had literally lived in Google land. Her parents were rich hippies, I suspect. She was cute and effervescent and, well, I'd be remiss in my Ferrerman duties if I didn't mention that she had a spankable bottom. The curious thing was that, though she had lived all over the world in her 27 years, she was concerned about the nudity aspect of the experience, particularly hers. She said her nickname was "The Nun" because she was rather reserved and conservative. This just struck me as odd as most of the rest of the world seems to be more at ease with nudity than Americans. There is a saying: "You may be American in the kitchen but, European in the bathroom."  Consider that.

Well, nudity is the premise of every episode so, no surprises there, and I think people get used to it pretty quick when they realize that finding food and water and not getting eaten by lions over the next 21 days takes priority over boners and blushing. I think they are three episodes in and the issue of unrequited boners hasn't been discussed and that's pretty much because- I believe- that these people are seriously exhausted by the elements.

Like I said, there's a camera crew involved, I think for every minute of the twenty one days (yikes!) of this experience but, it is cable TV  and they tend to take a lot of license, artistic or not. The camera crew is not naked and afraid and probably not looking for food and water. Unions, ya know They've made us soft! But, that aside, they are there to observe and not get involved, just like you with your  camera phone when someone is getting the shit kicked out of them. Just film it and put it on Youtube.

Well, internet searches have told me that there is some off-camera coddling of these people in the form of water and nourishment- maybe even IV's to keep them alive- just like on "Survivor" and, I would hope so. We are probably one teapublican president away from televised executions and celebrities hunting the homeless for sport and I'd like to enjoy the milk of human kindness as long as I can, while we still can before it completely curdles.

Damn. I just thought of one of my favorite, old-time movies- "Heaven Knows, Mr. Allison"! Robert Mitchum played a shipwrecked Marine and Deborah Kerr, a similarly displaced nun. They weren't naked (it was filmed in 1957 before nudity was discovered in Hollywood) and the scene was 1944 and WWII so, the Japanese who invaded the island provided the fear factor while Mitchum and Kerr danced around romance. Her character was an actual nun, ya know. I just wonder if the producers had that fine film in mind when they set this one up. It's a good film, check it out on Netflix!

The Marine in this one was laid up due to his sunburn and was, at first, resentful of the surfer girl who was providing 100% of their nutrition and hats made from leaves. It was like when you were first married and your bride only knew how to make one dish- COCONUTS!? AGAIN?!! Well, ya know, if you don't like coconuts (and I know I don't) fucking get up and find something else to eat!

So they weren't getting along. He bitched and she questioned his survival skills. Me too. When he got well enough to do something besides whine, he decided to dig for drinking water. That took a couple of days until he struck water. Sorta, water. It didn't look close to being potable. I've watched a few survival shows and when in doubt, please boil your water first because even clear water from mountain streams likely has millions of nasty microbes in it that will make you very sick and can kill you. The woman refused to drink it. He did.

He was lucky to escape with bad diarrhea. And she was unlucky that he didn't escape too far because he pooped about ten feet from their hut and she stepped in it. He knew better- the Marines teach pooping skills- but, when you gotta go, ya gotta go...

Editing of the promos had made it look like these two weren't gonna make it. But, he bucked up, swallowed his pride and realized that this little lady was taking care of him and was the reason they both were surviving. For x-number of days she really did carry him. Eventually he got better and helped out and they got to know each other better. He wised up and respected her and she realized that, though he was a Mr. Man, he just didn't have the skills to survive like she did. How incongruous! Temperament has a lot to do with performance in these situations and, so far, the female participants seem to be more team orientated and nurturing than the dudes.

I'm sure that will change. There are some insane bitches out there- as a trained, experienced Ferrerman, I know that. There's no cash prize for this program so, I think most of them opt to go on the "Big Brother" show. People do this because they want to test  themselves. It doesn't get much more extreme than naked, with a stranger, for 21 days. Look for it on the Discovery Channel, check your local listings.

Friday, July 5, 2013

A Piece Of The Pie

I was chatting with co-conspirator, Hegel, the other night about who is who on Topix and who isn't who. I'm often accused of being other people on Topix, probably by people who are absolutely sure I am that poster and they know this because...they are probably that poster and need to deflect. We were talking about the long held belief that some have that I am the gray box poster generally known as "dem".

We both know dem. This is to say we don't actually know him but, we know him. dem is fucking hilarious! He's profane as all get out and nobody does profanity- nearly within the parameters of Topix- better than dem. In context, he's the funniest m-effer on Topix by far! I'm envious of the way he'll completely disembowel a republitard, a Kevin or a Sam in a rapid-fire, full-auto style. I wish I were that funny. Well, maybe I don't. If I was it wouldn't be so much fun to read.

Whereas I finesse these freaks and Hegel does that plus dekes them out of their shoes with logic, dem is the heavy hitter that makes them sorry they ever decided to be assholes. He's our Luca Brasi.

So, I'm flattered when some idiot like Sam or Kevin declares that I am dem but, they are still batting .000. Either one of them is stupid enough to be Billy Rubin. Billy Rubin is a disease, ya know. The symptoms are: having a fake twin, and being a shoe-shopper. There is no known cure.

Anyway, I told Hegel that there are a few uber trolls on Offbeat that I've never posted with. Sweetie Pie comes to mind. Vee. Rosa. And Adrain Devine. I have no real interest in these people and barely read them. For all I know they are the same person. I've always found it odd- telling maybe- that these people have never posted to me either. I'm pretty high-profile and I have a lot of the same enemies that these people have but, I don't think they've ever posted to me. They might not care about me either! HA! I can live with that.

I've long felt that the aforementioned were Clique characters anyway. I look at who hates them and it strikes me that, if the likes of Sam and Laura Beth (marked down from Laura Beffy) despise Sweetie Pie and the others so much it's more than troll jealousy. Where is the professional courtesy? It's sorely lacking. It might be self hatred....

Creating enemies to troll the group is as old as the Topix Hills. You have to have villains, even if it means making them up. You need a Rosa or a Sweetie Pie to cause the group to circle the wagons to protect from attacks. Angelique did that on the Chicago Forum until s/he ruined the dregs with his/her mischief so, it doesn't take a lot of smarts. It's a good idea, I guess, if you have to have enemies and you have  to keep your minions in line. Made up enemies are more reliable than Ferrermen, who don't really like to respond to stupid troll posts when they're trying to edumacate the unwashed political masses of Offbeat. Whoever plays that idiot Sam never figured that out.

Do I know who Sweetie or Rosa is? No. I only know who isn't. This puts me light years ahead of the person(s) who are these people and hundreds of others, the flotsam and jetsam of Topix. I mean seriously- if they wanted to know who Sweetie Pie is, all they have to do is ask their mod. It's that easy.

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

The bottom of the field

It was almost a year ago that I wrote about race car driver, Danica Patrick, being a bitch. Well, I don't so much think that she is a bitch anymore than I think any of her fellow male drivers are bitches, which is to say, yep, most of them are. It was just that at that time she was getting trolled a lot by fans who thought that because she is a woman she had no business trading paint with the boys. That post is available elsewhere, somewhere on this blog.

Now Danica is in the news again because Kyle Petty has deemed her to be "a marketing machine" and "...someone who can go fast but is not a driver..."

A marketing machine in a sport where the cars are rolling billboards and the drivers are walking billboards? Imagine that! Does NASCAR know about this? They might be shocked, shocked to find advertising and promotion going on in a sport that is The Fortune 500 on wheels.

Sheesh, Kyle Petty, do you THINK?

Kyle is an announcer for TNT's coverage of NASCAR. Before that he was a journeyman driver for 30 years, working for several car owners and I think he won 8 races. Not bad. But, before that, he was born the son of the greatest driver in NASCAR history, Richard "The King" Petty. In fact, he still is The King's son! Some say he always will be!

I bet at some point in his career he may have heard whispers that, the only reason he had a Cup ride was because of the legacy of his father.

I am certain, in fact, that he did, because I've read that and heard that for years. When your dad is the best there ever was and you follow in his footsteps in the family business, you better be really, really good or you will forever look like the toddler traipsing around in daddy's boots. It just won't be cute anymore when you are thirty.

I think it's safe to say that Kyle could drive the car fast but that he wasn't a racecar driver. Yep, there is a difference. A racecar driver would have won a lot more races in 30 some years. Having a 30 year career of mediocrity isn't a luxury too many people in a business like NASCAR are afforded. It takes a ton of money to work your way up to the point where someone is willing to spend a ton of money on you to drive fast on Sundays. They expect you to be a racecar driver for those millions.

I think Kyle got a ton of breaks because of the Petty name. Kyle Jones would have been out of racing after a year or two of not running well, if he ever got to Cup level in the first place. There is always someone behind you and they may be faster and better.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. took up for Danica. His late father is second to Richard Petty in NASCAR greatness. Maybe better. The two were the best of their generations and it's hard to compare them, like Ruth and Aaron even though they did compete against each other.

Junior knows what it's like to be the son of the greatest. A very likable kid, he has had comparatively far better success than Kyle did. So far, 19 Cup wins in 15 years. Pretty much off the line, Junior had the adoration of his father's legions of fans. Even people like me who didn't like his daddy, like Junior. I think his nick knacks sell better than any other drivers. He's kind of a... marketing machine...in that respect.

He can drive fast but, honestly, I don't think of him as a driver either. Nor do I think that, without a famous name, he would have had anything resembling a career in NASCAR. It's too hard to break in without a buttload of money behind you. And that plus a famous name helps too.

Danica Patrick having a spankable bottom helps her for sure. It helps the sport too but, it really helps the business that NASCAR is most of all. Yeah, she's a marketing machine. Duh. Yeah, she's got a spankable bottom (in this Ferrerman's expert opinion) and, yeah, she can drive fast. None of these things are crimes in her business or make her less deserving than your average Petty or Earnhardt.

Every week in NASCAR, 42 cars begin the race. It's really a race between the ten best of those cars. The other 32 are there to fill out the field. One of those guys in the back of the pack could win the race but, not likely. One of those guys back there might be the better driver but, in a sport about money, that pays really good for showing up, a lot of guys are just happy to be there.

This is Danica's first full year in Sprint Cup. I think it's too soon to tell if she's a driver yet. I know it is too soon for the likes of Kyle Petty to be making that call. I'd like to hear from Mark Martin or Kenny Schrader- you know- racecar drivers, They might know best.