When I heard that an NFL player was bullying another player, my first thought was (after seeing Richie Incognito- the bully) was that his victim had to be a punter or maybe a safety. A smaller guy.
But, the victim, Johnathon Martin is 6'5", 312 pounds. He's a lineman just like Incognito.
It doesn't seem to fit until you consider that, in real life size doesn't always matter. They could both weigh 110 pounds soaking wet and one could still bully the other. Bullying is always psychologically based. Size certainly can be a factor as big kids bully little kids all the time and even into adulthood but, Incognito v. Martin highlights the mental aspect of it. Incognito got over on Martin as easily as he would someone half his size. Clearly he has a more dominant personality. Though linemen all are roughly the same size, fighting abilities aren't the wash it would seem. Bullies count on the promise of violence more than the actual act. If you make someone think you can kick their ass, you already have. That is bullying.
A bully usually is willing to ruin his day along with yours. He (or she) counts on the fact that you don't want the trouble that fighting in school can bring and- of course- you're none too thrilled about the bruising and possible bleeding. So, they do the dance of intimidation. They keep looking until they find the right partner.
I don't know these two guys. I'm gonna guess that Martin is a quiet guy, perhaps kind of a loner. Some people perceive that as weakness.
And Incognito is surely a loud-mouthed asshole. I've only read stories and seen pictures. I'm gonna bet I'm right. Any of you little shits wanna step up and PROVE ME WRONG??!! I DIDN'T THINK SO- YA FUCKIN' PUSSIES!!!!
OK, relax. I was just play-acting, to prove a point! As a Ferrerman, I took an oath to only bully the bullies. But, that little outburst did change the dynamic of this post for a bit, didn't it?
Bullies are almost always "on". They tend to be jagoffs 24/7/365. The anger is always there, even if it's not always showing. Real people may occasionally erupt in anger for various reasons but the bully wallows in it. Few people want to join him there.
My second thought about this was, why were the other players letting this happen, particularly the black players. Incognito regularly used the nigger ("n-word) word. Why did they put up with that?
Teamwork, I guess. From Pee Wee leagues on up, football players are taught to be tough, hit hard and exploit others weakness's. I'm guessing that many of them looked down on Martin too- for whatever reason. And, I think it's a given that some also feared Incognito. I'm going to guess that Incognito wasn't bluffing about violence like some schoolyard bullies might be. No doubt he can bring it and, well, some of those other big, tough guys probably didn't want to find out that Richie could own them too. So, they went along with it, perhaps thinking: "Better him than me." Evidently, cowards come in all sizes just like bullies. And sometimes- like politics- it's a matter of teamwork. Life is all about which team you choose. Good v. Evil. It happens every day in the schoolyard of life.
9 comments:
byline: Deer Whisperer/Luke
You've probably seen Incognito's history on college and NFL teams. The latter includes being voted the dirtiest player. He also got kicked off the St. Louis Rams team after confronting the head coach (before Fisher).
Seems like he escalated hazing to harassment beyond Martin's rookie year which entails voice mails (texts too?) containing racial slurs and family threats.
This is beyond trash talk (and I thought that only was directed to opponents???). And actually reminds me of these Offbeat cretins who go beyond trash talking on the threads and I guess PMs to actually contacting "the enemy" by phone which can include even family and/or work staff pertaining to "the enemy".
All to "win".
I will never understand how some of these assholes can be on at 3am their time and claim to have a job?
He's a piece of work, indeed. No doubt he's been a bully at every stage of his career.
The internet is the great equalizer for bullies like the Colt's were for the old west. It meant little people could shoot folks in the back then, and now.
What a parallel to Topix, where there is a well known bully on her own thread 24/7/365.
Eh...sorry I don't follow football, but who is the slugger in MLB known for bullying? Was it Albert Pujols or Prince Fielder? Or neither? The Internet says Barry Bonds, but I'm not sure about that. He's just arrogant. Then again, have you ever heard of a bully who was humble? lol
Bonds was a jerk but,I can't think of any serious bullies in MLB. I'm sure there's been some. Baseball players tend to be humbled (for the most part) by growing up in impoverished countries or a few years riding buses before they make major league money. Most guys in the NFL have been stars at every level since they were kids, and used to preferential treatment. There's a generous allowance for jerkiness. And, smashing heads with other fellas for a living is some pretty serious macho bonding. I don't see the victim getting a lot of support from fellow players. They have nothing to gain by that.
I just spoke with a Nebraska fan. He informed me Richie was thrown off the Nebraska team for being an obnoxious a hole. Then signed on to play at Oregon only if he completed an anger management course. He didn't. Let go. Guy has some inner issues
it is easy to be bullied when it is institutionalized. The entire team and management is lining up behind Incognito
Incognito has "asshole" written all over him. I'm not too surprised that many players are siding with him though. Nobody wants to be seen as "weak". Ironically, they are weak.
Bullies nearly always have an underlying feeling of insecurity and look for destructive ways to give themselves a false sense of worthiness.
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