Friday, October 14, 2011

ConSERVEative

You can't spell conservative without *serve*. Well, no *e*. I guess they dropped it because they are frugal.

Pretty neat slogan, eh? I came up with that!

Yeah, me- the liberal! You haven't heard that before from any conservative even though it's a nifty slogan that could be put to use by conservatives to make people think they aren't a bunch of angry assholes. This is because they are a bunch of angry assholes. They don't want to serve anybody because, as Jesus Christ and the other founding fathers intended, it's every man for himself here and the only people who serve, are lazy democrats and congressmen. America is a buffet- serve yourself and keep as many of them out of the line as you can so they'll always be more for you!

I found out recently, that at my sister's house they use the hippie bathroom policy; "If it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down". LIBERALS!

You're half right. My little sister is liberal but her hubby is decidely conservative. The bathroom policy is his idea. I haven't actually discussed this with him but, knowing him, it's a matter of money as well as conservation. I do the same thing and have for years because 5 gallons or 3.5 gallons is waaaay to much water to dispose of a coffee cups' worth of beer or- well- coffee residue. This is the same whether I'm paying the water bill or not. I just don't see the need to waste water.

You might be surprised how many people who call themselves conservatives do see the need to waste water and other resources. They literally say it's our RIGHT.

A bit un-conservative, says I. But they are seriously against low-flush toilets and the new lightbulbs as if they really were a liberal conspiracy to control their lives. In the threads, several different conservatives have posted that they flush toilets every chance they get for no other reason except because  they can.

Take THAT you fucking liberals!

And thousands more are stocking up on the inefficient, incandescent lightbulbs to thumb their noses at the energy efficient CFL's that the libs mandated!


Ferrerman's note: The CFL mandate was signed by noted liberal, GW Bush. Obama and liberals get the blame for everything so, I don't even wonder why any more. They just do...

Anyway, the new CFL's are supposed to last up to nine years. The old bulbs lasted anywhere from 9 minutes to nine months. Ninety percent of the energy used by incandescents turns into HEAT. They were great for Easy Bake Ovens and OK for lighting.  So, the reverse is true of CFL's. Unless most of your cooking is done on your kid's Easy Bake, what do you need  the old-fashioned bulbs for? Childhood memories?

Ya know, for a group of people who practically believe they are a race (and the chosen one at that) these assholes sure do bitch a lot! They fucking whine about EVERYTHING! I just don't get the God-given, constituitionally ensured, motherfucking right, to waste resources. Water, electricity, oil equals: WE GOT IT/ WE FUCKING FLAUNT IT!!!!

We are, of course, the first country in the history of the world that the vast majority of it's citizens have indoor plumbing and it's a given that we can poop and shower all day long and at relatively low cost. How many people in India or Africa (to name just one country and one continent) can say that?

This, of course, makes us better than everyone else and more deserving of the world's natural resources  than the lazy people who do not have indoor plumbing because, well, I guess they don't deserve it. They're not Americans! DUH!

My BIL is one of the smartest guys I know. He's very practical. I don't know why he's not a democrat, he's so smart. He doesn't really follow the politics much and would be very shocked to learn that people who call themselves "conservative" are so wasteful and foolish. And so...liberal in their use of all the worlds resources. So....entitled.....

It would behoove them to become more....conSERVative.

How wonderfully ironic!

13 comments:

Maggie said...

I hear conservatives like to hang on to their money. No offense to the BIL.

I just use the kitty litter box.

ex-ferrer said...

Does your money clump up?

Conservative as a political phiolosphy isn't used correctly these days. Republican doesn't equate to conservative in thought and action- it just plays well in sound bites. There wasn't anything conservative about Bush!

Maggie said...

What money?

Bush, oh what can I say about the worst President, ever?

Hey, my wv is 'pubtraw.'

ex-ferrer said...

Mine yesterday on yours was "paint"!

Anonymous said...

just the other day I mentioned to a brit that Bush is never at fault, and that a way must be found to move it to clinton, or pass it over to Obama.
bush is "he-who-must-not-be-named"
.
good times.
Annie

ex-ferrer said...

They go back to FDR! Europeans are well-versed about our politics and were not at all fooled by Bush. They know full well what Obama has been up against and I believe they fear one of these repug contenders as much as we do.

janice said...

It's been a while, ubt I continue to not read your posts, Ferrerman. Having not read your latest on conservatives, I feel the urge to share it w/ various fb friends.

ex-ferrer said...

Thank you, Janice, for being a fairly dedicated non-reader. I may have thousands. I think. It's hard to tell.

;)

Sue J said...

My first visit, Ferrerman.
We in the antipodes have had dual flush toilets for ....... well, at least the last 25 years, possibly longer. Living on the driest continent we are very 'water aware'. I don't think we've ever used the full-flush. A small water saving tip - you can cut down on flush water volume by sticking a house brick or two in the cistern.
I do hope Obama gets in again. He most certainly inherited the poisoned chalice and is thwarted at every turn. It must be most frustrating for him and his followers.
Also, I'd like to ask why it's so necessary for all candidates to flaunt their religion at the hustings? I always thought that the separation of state and church was written into your constitution.
We have a declared atheist as our Prime Minister, and all the tub thumping, bible bashers that are rife among the candidates for President I find rather scary. You can get away with pretty much anything if you drag God into the mix.

ex-ferrer said...

Hi Sue J. Nice to see you here! Our original consitution has just one reference to religion; prohibiting any religious test from being a requirement to hold a public office. Interesting that Obama didn't make much about his being religious but the republicans did, declaring him Muslim while they simultaneously condemned his Christian MINISTER. Oy Vey! Your last line answers the question of why they flaunt their religion. It makes a lot of things a blank check with the public if God is your co-signer.

Antipodes? That explains the lovely accent.

janice said...

Well, i may have just non-posted a link to your blog on FB, so your ranks of non-readers may swell by one or two. Beware!

ex-ferrer said...

I appreciate that, Janice. Everyone is non-welcome here and I don't mean it like that.
I think.

Sue J said...

I forgot to say that we can't buy incandescent globes anymore either and haven't been able to for a while. It was decided that they would be removed from sale and we would have to use energy savers. Mission accomplished. I have no complaints.