Friday, August 26, 2011

Hello, Teaparty? This is your bluff calling....

Three dictators have been deposed- by the people- this past Arab Spring/Summer. It seems that everyone is saying "NO!" to dictators.

Everyone, that is, except America.

Obama still rules America with an iron fist. Oh, there may be no tanks and troops in the streets but- make no mistake- there is socialistic healthcare for all pointed at our heads. And, that Constitution that he wipes his ass with? Well, it still has a 17th Amendment! All the others too!

The teaparty is certain that they will prevail in the '12 presidential election no matter who they run.

Um, hello! Dictators do NOT lose elections! Always winning elections is how they stay in power. The teaparty will have to do better.

They will have to revolt.

They claim to have the will of the people behind them. FOX polls prove this and they, BTW, are the most watched, most popular, non-Lamestream media outlet. They have the backing of wealthy Americans. They have 2nd Amendment remedies. They claim they have the military behind them as well.

So, where is the fucking revolution?

What is taking so long?

Pussies.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Dangerous Minds?

Back in the day, I used to tend bar. Dedicated non-readers know this. Now you know it too.

Before there was the internet, there were bars. If you were angry and/or stupid, there was a bar for you.

These days there are still bars but, with the internet and more stupid people than ever in the history of the world, more people are opting to *phone in* their anger and stupidity over the internet. They probably all have DUI's or have been kicked out of all the bars in walking distance. And, let's face it: you don't have to wear pants to be on the internet. You ladies know what I'm talking about!

There was an old guy back in the day who used to drink burgandy wine by the half carafe and periodically announce, to no one at all in particular: "and the Catholic church has a home for pregnant nuns!"

Well, fine. It'd be rude to put them out on the street, not having husbands and all so, nice of the church to care. Honestly, the man said this A LOT. He also would blurt out that his daughter was a prostitute and a heroin addict. I had given up trying to engage him in normal bar room banter and after a time didn't even bother to fuck with him by asking if there was anything new in the Catholic church world. I just had to accept that it was this guy's mission in life to come to this bar, drink wine and remind me and anyone else that nuns can indeed, get pregnant. It was like Bill Murray's "Groundhog's Day" for him. For me it was just like re-runs as I had other customers and better things to do, for the most part. I have never suffered fools gladly but, suffer them I do.

The internet is the bar room of the 21st century. It is chock-fucking full of fat old men lamenting pregnant nuns and junkie daughters and handsome Ferrermen making fun of them. Who knew? Well, if there is a forum for pregnant nun discussions, I haven't found it but, the wine-drinking nuts are there. Mostly they are blurting out shit about liberals and colored presidents but they make as much sense as the guy with the nuns. They just talk (as it were) to hear themselves talk. And they do it because they can. I couldn't throw that old guy out back in the day because he never really did anything to warrant that. It's similar on the threads. Just ignore the idiots.

Kinda hard to do though because there are so many of them. Mostly it's several assholes using several socks to inflate their ego and numbers. I certainly don't mind anyone being republican and having an opposing political view but, if you started screaming that Obama  was ruining the country, the moment he got elected, you don't HAVE a political opinion. You're an asshole. You might as well have a junkie daughter who is a pregnant nun. If you really believe that our president is only (Ferrerman's) president, you do not have a political opinion. You're an asshole. If you think that the president shouldn't have vacations or Air Force1 like other presidents, you do not have a political opinion. You're an asshole. And if I see a pattern developing and suspect that you hate this president so much because he's black, then you have no political opinion AND you are a racist asshole. And if you accuse me of playing "the race card" because I think you have no political opinion and you're a racist asshole, you just PROVED you are a racist asshole.

Why do I bother? I don't know. These fuckheads are as dense as the pregnant nun guy. Instead of taking up space on a barstool, they are taking up bandwidth on the internet. So what, Ferrerman? Why do you care? There are so many intelligent, humorous, kind people who don't hate America to play with. People who aren't violent and mean and who actually love America and want to improve it rather than burn it down for the insurance. I've got my friends on Facebook to keep me hopeful. Most all various degrees of liberal, of course, but all sane and politically astute. Musta been something in the water back in the day, at school. Dangerous minds, all of us. Imagine that- loving and caring about people = *dangerous minds*! People who scream about colored presidents think they are the sane and righteous ones.

I wonder if the Catholic church still has a home for pregnant nuns? I doubt that guys junkie daughter took over the family business. But, so many other assholes have gone into business for themselves....

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Wake up call

I woke up this morning thinking about "lowest common denominators" and "the debt ceiling". This is silly because the debt ceiling crap was sooooo two weeks ago. People quit *caring* about that after about two days of Monday morning quarterbacking. The teapublicans won that one and everyone moved on to Iowa and all it's flavors of corndogs and teapublican candidates to be named later.

Are you the lowest common denominator amongst us?

We really don't matter to those who run things except when we care about things we are told matter. If you watch the news or read the threads, there are a variety of things that matter. Sometimes its HUGE things like debt-ceilings and Anthony Weiner's penis but, usually, it's small things put out there by the folks in charge to see what we think we think matters. They like to throw stuff out there to see what sticks- like how some people might make spaghetti.

Like 57 states. Most people know that the president did not say there are 57 states and certainly does not think their are 57 states so they don't care that there actually is a youtube out there of him saying something about having made stops in 57 states during the campaign of '08. Rational people know he meant 57 stops in X number of states. The lowest common denominator KNOWS though, that he believes that there are 57 states because that's what he said! They won't believe a motherfucking thing about anything else he says but, they will believe that. Because he said it. Sorta.  They just won't let that go no matter how stupid it makes them look. The folks on the threads can be forgiven. A clown avatar and a boner for president Obama  doesn't really add up to a real opinion that matters anymore than the initial mention of the 57 states bullshit by a paid, professional talking head did. Whoever *broke* that story is probably laughing at the clowns who believe it just as I am. Right now I'm looking at Bill Hammer (?) on Fox (the guy that looks like he might have been kicked by a mule and they just couldn't get the eyes right...) and I'm wondering if he walks out of the studio at the end of his shift and worries about rich people getting taxed. Is he a rich-people-getting-taxed-worrier or does he just play one on TV?

I don't know. He might believe everything he reads on his teleprompter. Maybe not. He doesn't make Beck/O'Reilly/Hannity cash but might think he needs to believe to continue working, to have hopes of making that cash. It's like when you're about six and you're pretty sure there is no Santa but, you're afraid that Christmas might completely go away if you don't play along. Most of us have been there, gotten past that.

But, do  the lowest common denominators amongst us- the one's that believe that Obama believes there are 57 states- still put out milk and cookies for Santa? Maybe. Why not? If you believe that taxing the nations wealthiest will hurt the economy and that ONLY cutting spending on social services can reduce a debt,  you might as well believe in Santa and the Easter Bunny too because, YOU ARE the lowest common denominator. Congratulations, you are the demographic most politicians and news organizations want to reach.  And, they know exactly where you are and that you are always there for them.

And they appreciate the milk and cookies!  

Monday, August 15, 2011

Anchors Away?

The various tea parties are all against "anchor babies". Apparently, anchor babies are generally Mexican and grow up to be democrats so, they need to be nipped in the bud or, in the crib.

Should just being born in America make you an American?

Don't be so quick to say "YES!" If you have children or grandchildren, should they be American citizens just because they were born here????

The differentiation may be that, unlike anchor babies, regular ol' babies of the non-anchor persuasion are born to Americans. What if  you had to prove that? What if, like the Mafia, to become a Made American, you had to be able to trace BOTH sides of your family back to the founders?

Yikes!

My father's side of the family has been here since the 1600's. We should own the place but, we drink a bit.... Mom's side got here in like 1902 (?) and my grandpa wasn't even born here! So, was mom an anchor baby?

The various tea parties rarely think things like this all the way through. They are in such a hurry to run absolutely EVERY aspect of our lives ( small government= micromanaged....) that they tend to take some things for granted. If you want to make birthright so special, consider that your birth wasn't necessarily that special either, that a lot of white people might have made the cut, just because they were born here. Do they get *grandfathered* or great-greatgrandfathered, as the case may be? Why should they but, not the Mexicans here now? More imortantly, why?

I'm not at all in favor of illegals. I certainly don't think illegals are a plot by the democrats to fatten their voting rolls. Illegals were brought here by republican corporate interests to build up profits by bringing down wages. Now that they've done that, if the democrats want to make them citizens, how is that any more obscene than what the R's did? How is that any different than people who just showed up here a coupla centuries ago? 

Just wondering- it's one of my rights as an American. Right? 

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Babysitter Wanted

I think that most conservatives would hire Casey Anthony to watch their grandchildren as long as she spoke ill of Obama and/or liberals.

That does seem to be the ticket in these days. Politics has always made strange bedfellows but, the Anthony statement might not be that absurd. In the threads, all sorts of odd folks have gathered together to condemn Obama who wouldn't necessarily have gotten along before.

Didn't people think he was going to unite the country?

In the republican debates, all sorts of odd folks have gathered too. The only thing they have in common is they all are against Obama and that just seems to be good enough. The only question left for the RNC is to pick which one is most against Obama and see if that is good enough to unseat him.

It might not be so, they're also making it hard for democrats to vote. If this were happening in another country, Jimmy Carter would be overseeing the voting.

I've yet to come across an intelligent republican debator in the threads. All are truly awful people who try to shout down opponents even though they must realize, you can't do that with the typed word. No matter how many times you call a poster *gay*, you still can't dispute the fact that GW Bush and friends ruined the economy for their own personal gain. They cite a Topix poll  that has absolutely NO restrictions on voting as *proof* that Obama will not be elected because *69% of respondents voted 'NO' 100+ times a piece*.

That's all??!! Unrestricted voting and 69% is the best you can do??????!!!!! Where do these people come from?

Good Lord!

Sunday, August 7, 2011

No poor man ever gave me a job!

That's a common statement from the right. As deep as summer puddles as they are, it passes for profundity.

Perhaps because of the way my mind works, I always wonder if it isn't also usually followed by: "....but a poor woman gave me a blow job!"

Take a step back. Don't jump into this apparent puddle just yet. I'm not talking about me getting my dick sucked. I'm referring to the Kochsuckers who habitually regurgitate the first witticism as if were the altruism of the history of the world. It isn't. It's, at best, the "Hope and Change" of the right wing. It's every bit as vague and promising.

There's another saying about oral sex: "Even bad head is better than no head". 

I swear- this is still not about me getting my dick sucked. Really!

People in Congress and on Foxnews and their minions in the threads worship the rich. They are (at least) metaphorically on their knees, taking the rich in their mouths, lovingly, adoringly and- seemingly- free of charge. They claim they do this more out of respect than worship but, there's no mistaking the reverence of power involved. Well, OK, there's money involved with Congress and Fox but, that doesn't make it right. That makes it prostitution. Whores do a lot of things for money but, for every Julia Roberts "Pretty Woman", there are 500,000 women feeding a drug habit or supporting a man. Maybe more.  What about the millions who just like sucking dick?

Yes, what about the tea baggers? We're told they are people just like us only patrioticly moreso. They've worked hard for what they have and they've done it for men who have worked even harder than they and they just want to keep all their hard-earned dollars and not share with the lazy folks. Why, for example, pay to feed the lazy children of lazy people when that money could be better spent feeding our glorious troops everywhere they are gloriously needed? So, teabaggers, in an apparent effort to shrink government, want ALL social services cut. Eliminate them and you make government small. Small is evidently good. Get rid of welfare and unemployment benefits and you force people to pull themselves up by their bootstraps and become millionaires. Or die. Just like the founders intended. Is it that simple or is it just that simple-minded?

So, the teabaggers are appropriately-named Kochsuckers, doing it because they like the associated power. Rich by injection, I guess. They're like the eye candy on the arm of the old, rich guy. Of course she loves him! And he loves her! And if he wasn't already married, he'd be married to her! And what- she should be with a poor man who gives her nothing?

Hell no! Who wants to be a slut? There's no money in it.  Just love, respect and freedom.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

THE LAZY BASTARDS!

They get government handouts, for nothing!

You've probably seen them in their fancy cars, wearing their fancy clothes, buying the fanciest cuts of meat at the supermarket.

They don't pay taxes! Why should they?

YOU pay their way! YOU!

They always have their handout!

And worse, they are violent, hate-filled people who despise YOU  and laugh at YOU for making it easy for them!

They call themselves a MINORITY and have a whole political party devoted to catering to them and their every need!

Disgusting! Lazy bastards don't want to work and won't work as long as some people in our government coddle them as they do!

When will this cycle ever end?!

Probably never. See, corporations are people too.

Funny how that worked out.