Thursday, March 8, 2012

Wouldn't you like to be a prepper too?

There seems to be an increased interest in the Apocalypse these days. I watched a program last night about "preppers", the folks who are preparing for doom and the company that helps them prepare.

There was a lot of frank, tough talk about defending your family against non-preppers; hungry, lazy people who had failed to prepare. One man called them "zombies".

It looks very expensive to a prepper. Neverminding the cost of guns and ammo has gone up since the notion that Barack Obama was going to become president, he is still president and it looks like he's gonna stay president and he's gonna take our guns away so, buy now because munitions will be really expensive when the zombies are scratching at your blast door, unless you were to lazy to buy a blast door in the first place.

In the 50's, with the cold war heating up, a lot of seemingly normal people built bomb shelters in their backyards in anticipation of a nuclear war with our Russian enemies. I sorta recall an episode of "Happy Days" where Howard Cunningham considered this, spoke to a bomb-shelter salesman and ultimately decided that maybe surviving a nuclear holocaust wasn't such a great thing after all. Hilarity certainly ensued. Being a light-hearted show, I don't think they got too far into the sadness of sitting safe inside your bunker while the Johnsons next door scratched at your blast door, melting from radiation. "We were supposed to have dinner with them this Saturday", Marian might have said, "now they are melting!" Perhaps Potsie might have been at the door, pleading to be allowed in. "Sit on it, Potsie!" Richie might say.

Ultimately, that's what prepping is all about. You prep and you are the "us" You fail to prep and you are the "them". Which side of the blast door do you want to be on?

I think it's all about killing. The future apocalyspe will be a living video game of killing. Some people do not want to miss that. With no law but that of the jungle, you can kill anyone you feel is a threat to you and your loved one's. It'll be a free play for preppers and, admittedly necessary. When you have the food and water, others will try to take it from you. I'm not sure how those others will have survived but then, that's why I'm not a bomb-shelter salesman. I think that the dirty little secret of preppers is that they'll survive to fight other preppers when that year's supply of food runs out. Whatever, you get to kill!

There's a bunch of scenarios of what might being about the circumstances that would necessitate bunkers and survival. Nuclear war is still a popular notion. Robots could take over. A disease could kill millions. A black guy could be president. An asteroid could smash into the earth. The Cubs could win the World Series. Lot's of things could happen, none of them good.

Though I like post-apocalyptic shows like "The Walking Dead", I don't want to jump at the opportunity to live in such a world. It seems that the people who are anticipating surviving doomsday are the same assholes running around in the woods now in full camo pretending to be protecting the Constitution from democrats. I already have to share this world with them, I don't want to share the cowardly new one with them. Sheesh- they're gonna really be assholes when they've got the M-4's and the MRE's!

But, that's not likely to happen anyway and if it does, I'm on the wrong side of the blast doors anyway and will most certainly be nuclear dust so, why should I care? Only the dead have seen the end of war, by the way. In a sense, they will be the chosen ones, having enjoyed life while living.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes this:

It seems that the people who are anticipating surviving doomsday are the same assholes running around in the woods now in full camo pretending to be protecting the Constitution from democrats. I already have to share this world with them

Maggie said...

Ugh, can you just see it- the loons will be the last to leave the building.

Okay, the Potsie line was frickin' hilarious.

Hegel said...

Catchy title! I'm reminded of the Y2K hysteria, but I know this is much worse. Still, there were a lot of interviews with the camo dudes working in army surplus stores at that time.

On the news the other day they were interviewing a voter who said he'd vote for anyone other than Obama because of all the rights he'd lost since the last election. Of course he couldn't list any.... THAT guy was probably a prepper, and like you, I'd rather just leave those assholes to get on with their post-apocalyptic lives. They'll ruin what's left of the place in no time, anyway.

ex-ferrer said...

I thought the title was cute as all get out and then, via google, I learned I was not as cute as I had thought. Apocalypse Now was already taken too.