Monday, October 31, 2011

Friday, October 14, 2011

ConSERVEative

You can't spell conservative without *serve*. Well, no *e*. I guess they dropped it because they are frugal.

Pretty neat slogan, eh? I came up with that!

Yeah, me- the liberal! You haven't heard that before from any conservative even though it's a nifty slogan that could be put to use by conservatives to make people think they aren't a bunch of angry assholes. This is because they are a bunch of angry assholes. They don't want to serve anybody because, as Jesus Christ and the other founding fathers intended, it's every man for himself here and the only people who serve, are lazy democrats and congressmen. America is a buffet- serve yourself and keep as many of them out of the line as you can so they'll always be more for you!

I found out recently, that at my sister's house they use the hippie bathroom policy; "If it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down". LIBERALS!

You're half right. My little sister is liberal but her hubby is decidely conservative. The bathroom policy is his idea. I haven't actually discussed this with him but, knowing him, it's a matter of money as well as conservation. I do the same thing and have for years because 5 gallons or 3.5 gallons is waaaay to much water to dispose of a coffee cups' worth of beer or- well- coffee residue. This is the same whether I'm paying the water bill or not. I just don't see the need to waste water.

You might be surprised how many people who call themselves conservatives do see the need to waste water and other resources. They literally say it's our RIGHT.

A bit un-conservative, says I. But they are seriously against low-flush toilets and the new lightbulbs as if they really were a liberal conspiracy to control their lives. In the threads, several different conservatives have posted that they flush toilets every chance they get for no other reason except because  they can.

Take THAT you fucking liberals!

And thousands more are stocking up on the inefficient, incandescent lightbulbs to thumb their noses at the energy efficient CFL's that the libs mandated!


Ferrerman's note: The CFL mandate was signed by noted liberal, GW Bush. Obama and liberals get the blame for everything so, I don't even wonder why any more. They just do...

Anyway, the new CFL's are supposed to last up to nine years. The old bulbs lasted anywhere from 9 minutes to nine months. Ninety percent of the energy used by incandescents turns into HEAT. They were great for Easy Bake Ovens and OK for lighting.  So, the reverse is true of CFL's. Unless most of your cooking is done on your kid's Easy Bake, what do you need  the old-fashioned bulbs for? Childhood memories?

Ya know, for a group of people who practically believe they are a race (and the chosen one at that) these assholes sure do bitch a lot! They fucking whine about EVERYTHING! I just don't get the God-given, constituitionally ensured, motherfucking right, to waste resources. Water, electricity, oil equals: WE GOT IT/ WE FUCKING FLAUNT IT!!!!

We are, of course, the first country in the history of the world that the vast majority of it's citizens have indoor plumbing and it's a given that we can poop and shower all day long and at relatively low cost. How many people in India or Africa (to name just one country and one continent) can say that?

This, of course, makes us better than everyone else and more deserving of the world's natural resources  than the lazy people who do not have indoor plumbing because, well, I guess they don't deserve it. They're not Americans! DUH!

My BIL is one of the smartest guys I know. He's very practical. I don't know why he's not a democrat, he's so smart. He doesn't really follow the politics much and would be very shocked to learn that people who call themselves "conservative" are so wasteful and foolish. And so...liberal in their use of all the worlds resources. So....entitled.....

It would behoove them to become more....conSERVative.

How wonderfully ironic!