http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4okoJG4nNuc
A buddy of mine sent me the link. I guess Timmy thought I'd be impressed with the shooting as, on the surface, four hits in nine seconds of moving targets is impressive. The guy's a pretty good shot.
What is it about ambushing animals that excites him so? Really, that's what it was. A buddy radios him that the Bambi family is coming towards him and he wipes them out. Well, that's hunting!
I've never been hunting but, have had dozens of friends who are fairly regular hunters, to varying degrees of success. Timmy, for example, grew up hunting with his dad in upstate New York. When we both lived in the mid-south, he was shut out on a few hunting trips but he had killed a deer or two when he was a kid in NY. I've got a brother-in-law who has gotten deer, I guess, and I know he has gone after Big Horn sheep and the like out west. Deer maybe but, why the fuck would anybody want to shoot sheep? I guess the horns make for a nice trophy?
True enough, our ancestors relied on hunting to actually, literally, put food on the table. That's just the way things were before the Piggly Wiggly. Probably most hunters today actually do eat what they kill but, except for those oddballs who purposely live in Alaska in the winter, they don't do this for lack of a Piggly Wiggly nearby. I pretty much understand the thinning of the herd aspect of hunting though some dispute the necessity of that. Evidently the humane thing to do is shoot some so that others may survive the bleak winter so they can be shot the next year. Sounds kinda republican to me. Woodsy death panels. I live in a suburban area that has many forest preserves that provide a natural habitat for deer and their food chain friends. People near those preserves may find deer dining in their yards or dashing in front of their SUV's. I recall six of them doing just that during the morning rush across six lanes of traffic, years ago. Yikes! You think our world changed in the last couple hundred years, what about theirs? Forget cougars and bears as enemies, now there are Ford's and Chevy's.
And guys with pump-action shotguns, sitting in tree-stands, waiting for them to scamper by. This isn't Hawkey and his Indian brothers running through the woods with flintlocks to get dinner. It's a multi-billion dollar business you dress in camouflage for. Deer, and I think all animals, are colorblind, by the way. Why on earth would you want to disguise yourself as the woods when there are other fellas with guns looking to kill things in the woods?! The deer don't notice bright orange but maybe Buck, who has probably been nipping at a flask, will and not shoot at your LL Bean designed subterfuge. Hunting accidents happen. How one dresses surely contributes to that. Errant shots happen, as well.
The guy in the video might not exactly be legal. As I understand, along with kill limits, there are gender specific limits as well. Killing bucks and does on the same day is frowned up. Killing four might be over the limit as well. I'm guessing that after orgasm and a cigarette, the shooter and his buddy got their story straight about who shot whom. "Damn big gubmint..."
Obviously, hunting never appealed to me. I like guns and shooting but, stationery paper targets or beer bottles appeal more to me than living creatures. I know that in a Romney presidency we'll all have to kill and dress our own food as, on Day Two, he intends to turn the reigns over to Paul Ryan and the Tea Party. Mitt's only there for Day One, to repeal Obamacare. His thing is delegating and collecting the cash while underlings pillage. It's going to be a brave new world of individualism, just like the founders intended...
But, I digress. Or do I? In this "us against them" world that current republicans exist in, not hunting (or being snarkastic about it) is the same as being agin it. It, of course, is not but, try telling them that. I suppose my BIL is respectful about hunting. (I wonder if they drank the blood of the deer of their first kill? That's gross and might be why I don' hunt. Of course, with a gun in my hand, I doubt anyone could make me drink the blood. I'd be very disrespectful of tradition, I think) Timmy might be too. They might both be sporting about it. I just don't see lying in wait to ambush a critter as sporting. The fella in the video could have stopped at one or two depending upon the limit. But, how orgasmic ally cool would that be? No doubt he's got a high-dollar fourwheeler to haul out the bodies and a big-ass Chevy to take them from there. Sporting, eh? Well, have you seen the price of meat at the Piggly Wiggly?! A fella has to make ends... meat...these days, right? Evidently, at all costs.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Friday, October 5, 2012
Bulldazzling!
No zingers. Huh.
Rmoney tricked me, I guess. Instead he went with a debate move which, I learned this morning, is called the "gish gallop".
Essentially, you throw out so many lies and half-truths at your debate opponent that he's so over-whelmed at your lies that he doesn't know whether to poop or go blind as he tries to figure out which lie to address first.
Every pundit this side of the GOP Headquarters at Foxnews knows Mitt Romney lied his ass off at the Debacle In Denver. As strategeries go, the gish gallop is lame and frowned upon whether it's at presidential debates or the highschool level. You won't win if you resort to it. The judges see right through it. It remains to be seen if it will help Romney or not but, I doubt it. He blew his wad on the first debate and Obama has cameras all around to artfully refute his opponents bullshit until the next debate. Lies are still lies at the end of the day and, when you wake up in the morning.
Like most of my kind, I was disappointed in our president that night. I made the expected analogies with sports metaphors about the Chicago Cubs and how close they have come in my lifetime to winning it all. Never minding the '69 team that broke my young heart and molded my future as a man, it reminded me of the '84 bunch that spanked the daylights out of the San Diego Padres, going up two-oh in the play-offs...only to drop the next three on the road. I mean-sheesh- the fucking Padres? They had them...
Well, I got over '84 and '89 (and a couple others...) because, you just have to wake up the next day and realize that your happiness cannot reasonably be left in the hands of 25 men whom you don't know and whom probably won't even look at you if you were to hand them a ball and ask for their signature. It's tough enough to be in love with one person and rely on them for emotional fulfillment. Either case, you deal with it.
But, we're talking about the happiness in the here and now of more than 300 million people. Their future happiness as well. This is beyond baseball, folks. The play-offs start today and I'll watch out of the love I have for the game itself. The game is bigger than a team. The political game may be bigger than one man but, it comes down to one man the way our system *works*.
It's a big fucking deal, as Joe Biden would say. It really is. Bulldazzler Romney may think he can lie his way into the White House but we the people have to stop that. We know who and what he represents and it ain't us. The guy told Jim Lehrer, the debate moderator, that- though he liked him and Big Bird- he was going to fire both (as president) because he doesn't want to borrow money from China to keep them employed! What the fuck kind of idiocy is that? Who thinks like that and expects a nation to follow suit in that logic?
Mitt Romney, that's who. George Bush fought two wars on money borrowed from China and we have the debt to show for it. This asshole wants to fight Iran AND cut everyone's taxes by 20%! Um, to pay for it? The reich keeps saying we need a businessman in the White House and that is on this asshole's resume but, this is not how your uncle runs his hotdog stand, now is it? It's how Romney ran things at Bain though. Who made millions and how many tens of thousands of people lost jobs and pensions?
Romney does not care about "us". We the people are pawns to be sacrificed as cheaply as possible. The presidency is something he feels entitled to. He'll say and do anything to gain this position. He's not done making money either. I joke that he'd put oil wells on the White House lawn but, you'd see them Yosemite- if the new owner would let you in- if this guy wins. Yep. And the reichwing supporters would support that because they are stupid enough to believe that such efforts would lead to cheaper gas....
We get the government that we deserve, folks. Let's not get the government that asshole republicans deserve.
Rmoney tricked me, I guess. Instead he went with a debate move which, I learned this morning, is called the "gish gallop".
Essentially, you throw out so many lies and half-truths at your debate opponent that he's so over-whelmed at your lies that he doesn't know whether to poop or go blind as he tries to figure out which lie to address first.
Every pundit this side of the GOP Headquarters at Foxnews knows Mitt Romney lied his ass off at the Debacle In Denver. As strategeries go, the gish gallop is lame and frowned upon whether it's at presidential debates or the highschool level. You won't win if you resort to it. The judges see right through it. It remains to be seen if it will help Romney or not but, I doubt it. He blew his wad on the first debate and Obama has cameras all around to artfully refute his opponents bullshit until the next debate. Lies are still lies at the end of the day and, when you wake up in the morning.
Like most of my kind, I was disappointed in our president that night. I made the expected analogies with sports metaphors about the Chicago Cubs and how close they have come in my lifetime to winning it all. Never minding the '69 team that broke my young heart and molded my future as a man, it reminded me of the '84 bunch that spanked the daylights out of the San Diego Padres, going up two-oh in the play-offs...only to drop the next three on the road. I mean-sheesh- the fucking Padres? They had them...
Well, I got over '84 and '89 (and a couple others...) because, you just have to wake up the next day and realize that your happiness cannot reasonably be left in the hands of 25 men whom you don't know and whom probably won't even look at you if you were to hand them a ball and ask for their signature. It's tough enough to be in love with one person and rely on them for emotional fulfillment. Either case, you deal with it.
But, we're talking about the happiness in the here and now of more than 300 million people. Their future happiness as well. This is beyond baseball, folks. The play-offs start today and I'll watch out of the love I have for the game itself. The game is bigger than a team. The political game may be bigger than one man but, it comes down to one man the way our system *works*.
It's a big fucking deal, as Joe Biden would say. It really is. Bulldazzler Romney may think he can lie his way into the White House but we the people have to stop that. We know who and what he represents and it ain't us. The guy told Jim Lehrer, the debate moderator, that- though he liked him and Big Bird- he was going to fire both (as president) because he doesn't want to borrow money from China to keep them employed! What the fuck kind of idiocy is that? Who thinks like that and expects a nation to follow suit in that logic?
Mitt Romney, that's who. George Bush fought two wars on money borrowed from China and we have the debt to show for it. This asshole wants to fight Iran AND cut everyone's taxes by 20%! Um, to pay for it? The reich keeps saying we need a businessman in the White House and that is on this asshole's resume but, this is not how your uncle runs his hotdog stand, now is it? It's how Romney ran things at Bain though. Who made millions and how many tens of thousands of people lost jobs and pensions?
Romney does not care about "us". We the people are pawns to be sacrificed as cheaply as possible. The presidency is something he feels entitled to. He'll say and do anything to gain this position. He's not done making money either. I joke that he'd put oil wells on the White House lawn but, you'd see them Yosemite- if the new owner would let you in- if this guy wins. Yep. And the reichwing supporters would support that because they are stupid enough to believe that such efforts would lead to cheaper gas....
We get the government that we deserve, folks. Let's not get the government that asshole republicans deserve.
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
The Jerk Store is open
The word is that Mitt Romney has been practicing zingers to combat Barack Obama at tonight's first debate. Given that the debate is about domestic issues- the economy, healthcare, etc.- Romney might want to stick to one story about those assorted issues and actually tell the American people what he intends to do rather than do his stand up set.
You don't plan zingers. Comedy, to me, is about location and timing. When you tell jokes, you provide the set-up to the punchline. With zingers, your opponent is supposed to provide the set-up and he or she does this unknowingly. You have to work off of what they say and, if they don't say it, you wind up being like George Costanza and later coming up with what you think is a zinger. With that sort of ill-fated timing, it is you that winds up at the Jerk Store, sitting on the shelf. In the best laid plans of mice and Mormon, you've got to be quick on your feet with zingers. Cute catch phrases or zings don't work if you're just getting them in there, regardless of timing. Romney should know this because the late, great, Ted Kennedy totally owned him years ago in the Massachusetts senatorial debates. Kennedy was the better man in policy as well as in wit.
Your Ferrerman is pretty quick on his feet. I'm often a hit on Facebook and I get trolled on Topix by so many losers because I've smacked the ironic shit out them a few times. I'm the reason that town's afeared of Ferrerman. I might have mentioned that a time or two. But, I can't give my greatest hits here because it's almost exclusively situational humor that would be an ordeal to outline and probably not all that funny, after all that as the context would be lost. You truly have to have been there. And, I don't write these things down. Maybe I should?
Mostly I feed off of what others say. Whether it's innocent or provocative, I'll find some irony in there and mine it. We're not talking meanness here. I really don't like to go there unless someone has already put them self in that neighborhood. I find myself holding my tongue in some social situations and biting my fingers on social networks. I try not to hurt feelings but, you can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs. The thing with the debates is, Romney, being the arrogant, out-of-touch rich asshole that he is, should be the one getting zinged, not the zinger. It's the zinger, not the zong? I don't know...maybe I should work on that one...
When Romney ad-libs, he finds himself insulting people. Like the time at the rainy NASCAR race when he was speaking to some fans who, to keep themselves dry, fashioned ponchos out of garbage bags. He said something like: "You really sprang for the big bucks on those!"
Ouch. A guy with $250+ million dollars to his name snickers at working folks attire. Well, he didn't even have a Barnaby's raincoat on himself so, don't disrespect the working folks who thought ahead enough to stuff a hefty bag into their back pocket because might rain. They may not have been fashionable but they were dry and he was all wet. He went on to compound things by admitting he didn't follow NASCAR but, some of his friends owned teams. Great. More millionaires. Well, they are his base.
Our president, on the other hand, is the sort of man who, while Navy SEALS are en route to kill Osama Bin Laden, stays stone cold cool about those events while verbally spanking the day lights out of Donald Trump at the Washington Press Corps event. I forget the timing. Bin Laden might have been dead by that time. But, shit was going down or had gone down and he was cool. It wasn't the proper venue for historical zingers.
I wonder if former comedian, Dennis Miller, has prepped Romney with material. We'll know if Mittens refers to our president as "Chachi" if he had a hand in there. Miller is the only republican I can think of who intentionally tries to be funny. The others just don't think on their feet when they speak. A smart guy would skip the comedy and debate the issues but, if that guy was in the republican primaries at all, he won't be representing the "R's" tonight. Well, they did say "anybody but Obama..." Romney is anybody. And he's an anybody who is about as prepared to be president of the United States as he is to be the featured performer at The Chuckle Junction.
"Don't forget to tip your waitress's and bartenders, ladies and germs. The standard 10% of course. 11% if they are properly civil in their service. Lousy 47 percenters... Oh, is this thing on?"
You don't plan zingers. Comedy, to me, is about location and timing. When you tell jokes, you provide the set-up to the punchline. With zingers, your opponent is supposed to provide the set-up and he or she does this unknowingly. You have to work off of what they say and, if they don't say it, you wind up being like George Costanza and later coming up with what you think is a zinger. With that sort of ill-fated timing, it is you that winds up at the Jerk Store, sitting on the shelf. In the best laid plans of mice and Mormon, you've got to be quick on your feet with zingers. Cute catch phrases or zings don't work if you're just getting them in there, regardless of timing. Romney should know this because the late, great, Ted Kennedy totally owned him years ago in the Massachusetts senatorial debates. Kennedy was the better man in policy as well as in wit.
Your Ferrerman is pretty quick on his feet. I'm often a hit on Facebook and I get trolled on Topix by so many losers because I've smacked the ironic shit out them a few times. I'm the reason that town's afeared of Ferrerman. I might have mentioned that a time or two. But, I can't give my greatest hits here because it's almost exclusively situational humor that would be an ordeal to outline and probably not all that funny, after all that as the context would be lost. You truly have to have been there. And, I don't write these things down. Maybe I should?
Mostly I feed off of what others say. Whether it's innocent or provocative, I'll find some irony in there and mine it. We're not talking meanness here. I really don't like to go there unless someone has already put them self in that neighborhood. I find myself holding my tongue in some social situations and biting my fingers on social networks. I try not to hurt feelings but, you can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs. The thing with the debates is, Romney, being the arrogant, out-of-touch rich asshole that he is, should be the one getting zinged, not the zinger. It's the zinger, not the zong? I don't know...maybe I should work on that one...
When Romney ad-libs, he finds himself insulting people. Like the time at the rainy NASCAR race when he was speaking to some fans who, to keep themselves dry, fashioned ponchos out of garbage bags. He said something like: "You really sprang for the big bucks on those!"
Ouch. A guy with $250+ million dollars to his name snickers at working folks attire. Well, he didn't even have a Barnaby's raincoat on himself so, don't disrespect the working folks who thought ahead enough to stuff a hefty bag into their back pocket because might rain. They may not have been fashionable but they were dry and he was all wet. He went on to compound things by admitting he didn't follow NASCAR but, some of his friends owned teams. Great. More millionaires. Well, they are his base.
Our president, on the other hand, is the sort of man who, while Navy SEALS are en route to kill Osama Bin Laden, stays stone cold cool about those events while verbally spanking the day lights out of Donald Trump at the Washington Press Corps event. I forget the timing. Bin Laden might have been dead by that time. But, shit was going down or had gone down and he was cool. It wasn't the proper venue for historical zingers.
I wonder if former comedian, Dennis Miller, has prepped Romney with material. We'll know if Mittens refers to our president as "Chachi" if he had a hand in there. Miller is the only republican I can think of who intentionally tries to be funny. The others just don't think on their feet when they speak. A smart guy would skip the comedy and debate the issues but, if that guy was in the republican primaries at all, he won't be representing the "R's" tonight. Well, they did say "anybody but Obama..." Romney is anybody. And he's an anybody who is about as prepared to be president of the United States as he is to be the featured performer at The Chuckle Junction.
"Don't forget to tip your waitress's and bartenders, ladies and germs. The standard 10% of course. 11% if they are properly civil in their service. Lousy 47 percenters... Oh, is this thing on?"
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Close calls?
After the chaos of Monday night's Packers/Seahawks game, the only thing left is the chaos of various people's takes on real referee's versus replacements. Surprisingly, famous union buster, governor Scott Walker (Asshole, Wisconsin) wants the real, UNION, refs back. It turns out they are better than non-union ones. Imagine that! And Rmoney and Ryan feel the same way despite their love for increased profits via low wages. Sports makes strange bedfellows, I guess.
Football is the number one sport in America. It's a 9-10 BILLION dollar business. I put that in caps for emphasis so I wouldn't have to say: "That's billion with a "B"!" It's a bigger business than teachers or plumbers or snowplow drivers so everyone has to take it seriously, even anti-union, scumbag republicans. "We've got to get those union guys back!" Never thought I'd hear them say that!
The NFL ref's are locked out. They are not "on strike". That's an important distinction. They have issues with the league but were willing to work while discussing those issues. The league rejected that, locked them out and sought the services of high school and junior college referee's to break the strike. They didn't do this over a lot of money either. Ref's are about 3 MILLION (with an "M") of that MUCHO BILLIONS the NFL makes every year. My understanding is the refs want a few more bucks- everyone does. They've already got a pension plan with the league, which is interesting given that they are part-time employees who, work one day a week. I gather that the HUGE issue is that the NFL doesn't want to back that pension. They'd prefer it be a 401k that they don't have to pay off on. Well, well. The republicans want to do that with Social Security. I'm sensing a theme here. With SS, we put actual dollars in a bank of sorts, to take out actual dollars when we're old. Wall Street see's other people's money laying around like that and they foam at the mouth. They, and republicans, think OUR money is better spent in Wall Street casino's because (a) YOU can get really, really richer than SS!!!! (b) If YOUR 401k doesn't do well, tough titties. It COULD have done better than that communist SS would have!
I think replacement refs came up with that idea....
You know, the regular ref's aren't all that, either. These overwhelmed, unprepared guys make us forget that. Oh sure, it's funny when a QB slides for a first down and the ref signals "safe" or "out" or calls traveling on run plays. That's entertainment! But, they get better each week or, at least less sucky. Yep, a bad call cost Green Bay a win this past Monday but, that bad call was inexplicably upheld by booth replay officials who ARE NOT replacement officials. I have no idea what they thought they saw that you, me and the rest of the world didn't. It could have been over-turned. Odd that it wasn't.
The money that the real ref's want is nothing. I think it's the thought that counts with these owners. Just like 4,000 individual millionaires pay no taxes regardless of the Bush Tax Cuts For Millionaires or not just like untold huge corporations, 39% or 35% don't mean shit when you pay zero percent no matter what. Referees are not going to take over the league or command huge salaries like the players do. Neither are teachers or snow-plow drivers. It's just the thought that counts. You got to remind people who owns the team. Who owns the league. Who owns the balls.
Interesting that the Green Bay Packers are owned by the people.... The only major sports franchise owned by...the people.
Well now, maybe we understand that call now?
Football is the number one sport in America. It's a 9-10 BILLION dollar business. I put that in caps for emphasis so I wouldn't have to say: "That's billion with a "B"!" It's a bigger business than teachers or plumbers or snowplow drivers so everyone has to take it seriously, even anti-union, scumbag republicans. "We've got to get those union guys back!" Never thought I'd hear them say that!
The NFL ref's are locked out. They are not "on strike". That's an important distinction. They have issues with the league but were willing to work while discussing those issues. The league rejected that, locked them out and sought the services of high school and junior college referee's to break the strike. They didn't do this over a lot of money either. Ref's are about 3 MILLION (with an "M") of that MUCHO BILLIONS the NFL makes every year. My understanding is the refs want a few more bucks- everyone does. They've already got a pension plan with the league, which is interesting given that they are part-time employees who, work one day a week. I gather that the HUGE issue is that the NFL doesn't want to back that pension. They'd prefer it be a 401k that they don't have to pay off on. Well, well. The republicans want to do that with Social Security. I'm sensing a theme here. With SS, we put actual dollars in a bank of sorts, to take out actual dollars when we're old. Wall Street see's other people's money laying around like that and they foam at the mouth. They, and republicans, think OUR money is better spent in Wall Street casino's because (a) YOU can get really, really richer than SS!!!! (b) If YOUR 401k doesn't do well, tough titties. It COULD have done better than that communist SS would have!
I think replacement refs came up with that idea....
You know, the regular ref's aren't all that, either. These overwhelmed, unprepared guys make us forget that. Oh sure, it's funny when a QB slides for a first down and the ref signals "safe" or "out" or calls traveling on run plays. That's entertainment! But, they get better each week or, at least less sucky. Yep, a bad call cost Green Bay a win this past Monday but, that bad call was inexplicably upheld by booth replay officials who ARE NOT replacement officials. I have no idea what they thought they saw that you, me and the rest of the world didn't. It could have been over-turned. Odd that it wasn't.
The money that the real ref's want is nothing. I think it's the thought that counts with these owners. Just like 4,000 individual millionaires pay no taxes regardless of the Bush Tax Cuts For Millionaires or not just like untold huge corporations, 39% or 35% don't mean shit when you pay zero percent no matter what. Referees are not going to take over the league or command huge salaries like the players do. Neither are teachers or snow-plow drivers. It's just the thought that counts. You got to remind people who owns the team. Who owns the league. Who owns the balls.
Interesting that the Green Bay Packers are owned by the people.... The only major sports franchise owned by...the people.
Well now, maybe we understand that call now?
Sunday, September 23, 2012
A clean, well-lighted, space
Probably the most over-used expression of perceived internet superiority is: "I'm living rent-free in your head!!!!!"
Someone might have zinged somebody really good with this line once but, now stalkers use it, as well as various other obsessive posters, who will drone on and on about someone and then spring the "rent-free" as soon as they post to them or mention them. In real life, a crazed stalker might say this after his victim screams when he pulls back her shower curtain. No wonder she is there everywhere he goes in life! She needs him!
So, it's supposed to be a put-down but 99% of the time it is just ironic. I was thinking about this, this morning when one of my friends posted a funny on Facebook about it being suspicious about "joggers always finding the bodies...."
Well, how about those prosecutors? They know stuff about the murders that even the defense doesn't know and they are the accused! Yet the judge- sitting right there- never considers that the prosecutor might have done it. On Topix they would...
But, Topix- we know by now- lives in my head, rent-free, I might add. Technically, anything and anyone you think about or have ever thought about, lives in your head. Homer Simpson, naked and banging Marge, doggie-style is in your head right now. I just put it there! Tee hee!
I wonder if headaches are literally someone doing remodeling work in your head? You just pray it's up to code and they know what they're doing.
Ya know, I think I deal with these crazy people so that you all- dedicated non-readers- don't have to. These people may be imaginary and on the internet but, they really exist in life and/or in other people's imaginations. This is to say, nothing happens on Topix that doesn't happen in real life. We should all be glad these people busy themselves on the internet rather than breaking into our bathrooms while we shower. If say, a Kevin, was a murderer coming up for a parole hearing, he'd be pissed that his victim's family would regularly attend his hearings.
"You people- AGAIN!? You're not over this yet???? I guess I live rent-free in your heads! Geez!!"
Misappropriation of logic is not limited to politics or the internet. It's real life too.
I make jokes here and in real life. Not everyone gets that. Topix is full of people you shouldn't make sudden moves around. I make sudden moves...Some of these moves- IRONY ALERT!!!!!!- happen in people's heads!!!!
Just like real life has "lookism" where you just don't like someone at first look and that's the way it is, Topix has that too, without actual looking though. I promise you I get a feel for a poster right away. I like to think I can gauge their sincerity (or lack of) pretty quickly and usually make the right call. I've read people wrong before. I can't say that people always read me wrong. If they don't like me, there's probably a good reason for this. Let's face it: Life comes down to good versus evil. I'm a liberal....
There is no one on the internet or IRL who doesn't like me who I wish did like me. There are good reasons these assholes don't like me. I'm good with keeping it that way. If the Angela's like me- yikes! That makes me stinky lady parts too! That's as bad as the Kevin's who say: "I like you, Ferrerman. That's why I'm going to kill you last!" (I get that a lot! Everyone on Topix is an evil genius, it seems.)
I joke about "anti-Ferrerman sentiment" but, ya know, without it, i'd be a real jerk, loved by some of the worst people in the world.
I keep an open mind but, not really looking to renting it out, just giving it away here. I really don't think my enemies could afford this neighborhood...
Someone might have zinged somebody really good with this line once but, now stalkers use it, as well as various other obsessive posters, who will drone on and on about someone and then spring the "rent-free" as soon as they post to them or mention them. In real life, a crazed stalker might say this after his victim screams when he pulls back her shower curtain. No wonder she is there everywhere he goes in life! She needs him!
So, it's supposed to be a put-down but 99% of the time it is just ironic. I was thinking about this, this morning when one of my friends posted a funny on Facebook about it being suspicious about "joggers always finding the bodies...."
Well, how about those prosecutors? They know stuff about the murders that even the defense doesn't know and they are the accused! Yet the judge- sitting right there- never considers that the prosecutor might have done it. On Topix they would...
But, Topix- we know by now- lives in my head, rent-free, I might add. Technically, anything and anyone you think about or have ever thought about, lives in your head. Homer Simpson, naked and banging Marge, doggie-style is in your head right now. I just put it there! Tee hee!
I wonder if headaches are literally someone doing remodeling work in your head? You just pray it's up to code and they know what they're doing.
Ya know, I think I deal with these crazy people so that you all- dedicated non-readers- don't have to. These people may be imaginary and on the internet but, they really exist in life and/or in other people's imaginations. This is to say, nothing happens on Topix that doesn't happen in real life. We should all be glad these people busy themselves on the internet rather than breaking into our bathrooms while we shower. If say, a Kevin, was a murderer coming up for a parole hearing, he'd be pissed that his victim's family would regularly attend his hearings.
"You people- AGAIN!? You're not over this yet???? I guess I live rent-free in your heads! Geez!!"
Misappropriation of logic is not limited to politics or the internet. It's real life too.
I make jokes here and in real life. Not everyone gets that. Topix is full of people you shouldn't make sudden moves around. I make sudden moves...Some of these moves- IRONY ALERT!!!!!!- happen in people's heads!!!!
Just like real life has "lookism" where you just don't like someone at first look and that's the way it is, Topix has that too, without actual looking though. I promise you I get a feel for a poster right away. I like to think I can gauge their sincerity (or lack of) pretty quickly and usually make the right call. I've read people wrong before. I can't say that people always read me wrong. If they don't like me, there's probably a good reason for this. Let's face it: Life comes down to good versus evil. I'm a liberal....
There is no one on the internet or IRL who doesn't like me who I wish did like me. There are good reasons these assholes don't like me. I'm good with keeping it that way. If the Angela's like me- yikes! That makes me stinky lady parts too! That's as bad as the Kevin's who say: "I like you, Ferrerman. That's why I'm going to kill you last!" (I get that a lot! Everyone on Topix is an evil genius, it seems.)
I joke about "anti-Ferrerman sentiment" but, ya know, without it, i'd be a real jerk, loved by some of the worst people in the world.
I keep an open mind but, not really looking to renting it out, just giving it away here. I really don't think my enemies could afford this neighborhood...
Friday, September 21, 2012
The Hotel Topixtown
I only post regularly on one thread these days. It's a very nice, eclectic thread owned and operated by my friend, Hegel. There's a few trolls who show up but, it's generally a nice blend of topical chatter, cute videos and life experiences shared amongst a nice group of interesting people. It is as Topix should be.
I confess to looking and lurking on other threads. There's two truths on Topix: confessing (as I just did) and speculating without any sort of evidence. Some people just know shit is *true*, mostly because they say so. What we don't always know is what happens to people after they quit posting. Is it like The Hotel California where, you can check out anytime you like but, you can never leave? Well, it's that plus people putting away old avatars and starting fresh to avoid or, perhaps annoy old enemies. Sometimes a name or avatar pops up and you remember that person and it might make you wonder whatever happened to someone else whom you hadn't seen in awhile.
Last night on the Chicago dregs thread one of the dregs wondered what had happened to the actual poster who had started the thread a few years back. Her name was *Andie*. Pay close attention to the spelling as misspelling causes some people to get very angry!
I had seen where a dregular wondered what had happened that caused Andie to stop posting, early in 2011. The poster speculated that her husband might have killed her.
Oh my. You just have to *know* some of these people as I do. They tend to leap to wild conclusions and then work backwards from that to something a bit more logical, usually after a few days of fighting. I guess it was true that Andie had an abusive husband but, to what extent, I just didn't know. Death, specifically by homicide, is not my first thought when I wonder why someone isn't posting anymore. (Though, to be Ferrer, if some of these people act in real life as they post, they could well be subject to the wrath of someone.) You just never know but, I assume a new avatar or forum abdication of Topix rather than homicide. Hey- you'll get me off Topix when you pry the keyboard from my cold, dead fingers!
So, the speculator did some sleuthing. She knew Andie's real name and pretty quickly found an obituary. There was no mention of cause of death. Andie died in February of '11. She had posted a couple days before that and there had been no mention of feeling poorly. One can only hope that she passed quickly and as painlessly as possible.
Now, regular, dedicated non-readers of this blog know that, boy oh boy, do I have some history with the dregs, the denizens of the AmyAbbyville territory of Topixtown. In fact, it has been said that I am the reason this town is afraid of Ferrerman! I read that somewhere. That aside, I thought I'd drop by and pay my respects. Angela (who goes by Redheadwithglasses) had this to say about my condolences:
"At least spell her name right, you insane dickless wonder.
(andie would have appreciated that!)"
YIKES! I replied that "(she's) a lot of fun at funerals". Andie (I had left off the "e") would have appreciated both my condolences and my snappy rejoinder.
Insane? Hardly.
Dickless? I'm X number of inches away from being dickless and over Angela's personal limit of inches. Also, kinda choosy...
Wonder? I'll take that. Might have been a typo...wonderful?
Well, not everyone handles the death of others well. Honestly, that had nothing to do with Angela's ire towards me. She had a severe degree of anti-Ferrerman sentiment long before it was popular.in AmyAbbyville or anywhere else. She's kind of a "c" word and rather proud of it. She's fond of a sick *joke* she's told a few dozen times about a serial killer walking a crying child into the woods. He says to the child: "What are you crying about? I'm the one that has to walk out of here all by myself". Well, I did say "c" word.
Others thought Angela was unnecessarily harsh towards my post. Many of the current dregs weren't around AmyAbbyville when A770 decided to go to war with Ferrerman (and lose, BTW) but, they have been informed of Ferrerman, as viewed by the tribal elders. As a wise Ferrerman once said: "Forget it, Ferrerman- it's Topixtown...."
I don't know why people can't be nice. We're only posting on this earth for such a short time.
Rest In Peace, Andie. I liked you even though I didn't actually know you.
That's often as good as it gets on Topix.
I confess to looking and lurking on other threads. There's two truths on Topix: confessing (as I just did) and speculating without any sort of evidence. Some people just know shit is *true*, mostly because they say so. What we don't always know is what happens to people after they quit posting. Is it like The Hotel California where, you can check out anytime you like but, you can never leave? Well, it's that plus people putting away old avatars and starting fresh to avoid or, perhaps annoy old enemies. Sometimes a name or avatar pops up and you remember that person and it might make you wonder whatever happened to someone else whom you hadn't seen in awhile.
Last night on the Chicago dregs thread one of the dregs wondered what had happened to the actual poster who had started the thread a few years back. Her name was *Andie*. Pay close attention to the spelling as misspelling causes some people to get very angry!
I had seen where a dregular wondered what had happened that caused Andie to stop posting, early in 2011. The poster speculated that her husband might have killed her.
Oh my. You just have to *know* some of these people as I do. They tend to leap to wild conclusions and then work backwards from that to something a bit more logical, usually after a few days of fighting. I guess it was true that Andie had an abusive husband but, to what extent, I just didn't know. Death, specifically by homicide, is not my first thought when I wonder why someone isn't posting anymore. (Though, to be Ferrer, if some of these people act in real life as they post, they could well be subject to the wrath of someone.) You just never know but, I assume a new avatar or forum abdication of Topix rather than homicide. Hey- you'll get me off Topix when you pry the keyboard from my cold, dead fingers!
So, the speculator did some sleuthing. She knew Andie's real name and pretty quickly found an obituary. There was no mention of cause of death. Andie died in February of '11. She had posted a couple days before that and there had been no mention of feeling poorly. One can only hope that she passed quickly and as painlessly as possible.
Now, regular, dedicated non-readers of this blog know that, boy oh boy, do I have some history with the dregs, the denizens of the AmyAbbyville territory of Topixtown. In fact, it has been said that I am the reason this town is afraid of Ferrerman! I read that somewhere. That aside, I thought I'd drop by and pay my respects. Angela (who goes by Redheadwithglasses) had this to say about my condolences:
"At least spell her name right, you insane dickless wonder.
(andie would have appreciated that!)"
YIKES! I replied that "(she's) a lot of fun at funerals". Andie (I had left off the "e") would have appreciated both my condolences and my snappy rejoinder.
Insane? Hardly.
Dickless? I'm X number of inches away from being dickless and over Angela's personal limit of inches. Also, kinda choosy...
Wonder? I'll take that. Might have been a typo...wonderful?
Well, not everyone handles the death of others well. Honestly, that had nothing to do with Angela's ire towards me. She had a severe degree of anti-Ferrerman sentiment long before it was popular.in AmyAbbyville or anywhere else. She's kind of a "c" word and rather proud of it. She's fond of a sick *joke* she's told a few dozen times about a serial killer walking a crying child into the woods. He says to the child: "What are you crying about? I'm the one that has to walk out of here all by myself". Well, I did say "c" word.
Others thought Angela was unnecessarily harsh towards my post. Many of the current dregs weren't around AmyAbbyville when A770 decided to go to war with Ferrerman (and lose, BTW) but, they have been informed of Ferrerman, as viewed by the tribal elders. As a wise Ferrerman once said: "Forget it, Ferrerman- it's Topixtown...."
I don't know why people can't be nice. We're only posting on this earth for such a short time.
Rest In Peace, Andie. I liked you even though I didn't actually know you.
That's often as good as it gets on Topix.
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Big Brother- I'm watching you!
I think I've previously professed a guilty pleasure in the Shows "Big Brother" and "Survivor". I'm neither proud nor ashamed as both are popular, innocent fun enjoyed by millions of others. My friend Thingy is a fan. She publicly denounced me in her blog for getting her into BB but, I know she is in a not-so-secret alliance with me in a shared appreciation for it. A former Topix co-conspirator of mine denounced it as "Topix on TV" and K was pretty fairly correct in that assessment but, I view it as Topix on TV but, with a purpose. 500,000 of them, in fact.
What is it- 14 people start out in a closed set house hoping to spend three months away from loved ones for a chance at half a million dollars? Who does that? They're not all *Type A* personalities that are driven to success. That would be Ultimate Fighting or politics. BB is a blend of those plus cannon fodder. I watched every episode but, on the finale last night, the first few people evicted were kinda foreign to me. Well, it was over two months ago. The show isn't as heavily edited as Survivor is. That show takes place over 32 days real time and has long-since been decided by the time it premieres it's first episode. Both shows are edited and have been accused of staging events, confrontations and conversations for continuity and artistic license. I can live with that as, well, that's showbiz.
I like the group dynamics of both shows. Who steps up? Who steps down to "fly beneath the radar". Survivor tends to be more about leadership and competitions because of that deserted island theme but it, like BB, is heavy on secret alliances and back-stabbing.
Before Topix, I used to equate both shows with work. You'd be shocked at how cutthroat painting is unless you stopped to consider the jerks that you work with. Now you know what I'm talking about. People do the darnedest things at work. Even if there's no immediate financial reward, they try to outwit, outlast, outplay by being duplicitous assholes. Sheesh.
Topix is ultra-duplicitous, filled with false alliances, rumors, innuendo and general skulduggery. It's filled with everything but a season finale. So many people winning but, no closure. No cash either. What is the point? No one knows.
Anyway, It's hard to make it to the final of either show (the TV one's, I mean) without getting a little dirty and a little bloody. AND, you have to answer to the people you very likely dirtied and bloodied. AND they have to decide if you earned the right to the money they had come to win.
Nobody played a more interesting, diabolical game than Dan did. Though he was instantly lauded for his brilliance when he staged his own *funeral*, he lost me when he *turned* on Danielle and brought her to anguished tears. That was cold. We all quickly learned it was a stunt (and *brilliant*) but, it was painful to watch. We didn't want to see her hurt. I'm sure it won him another shot at the game in the near future as the best ever to play the game and, he probably is the best. He's won before. Fuck him. He made the cute, dumb chick cry...a few times...
Ian, the boy genius, was duplicitous himself. He did it without being a Machiavellian jerkface though. To me, that's the game. One goes into it knowing that every other player wants the half-million dollar prize and WILL lie to you to get it. DUH! I'm more offended by someone foolishly believing an obvious liar and then being angry because that person lied to them on a reality show!!!! It's like Louie in Casablanca being shocked- shocked- to find gambling going on. Only it was cute with Louie. It's pathetic without.
My fear last night was that Ian didn't vote out Dan when he had the chance. There had been other chances to get other dangerous contenders this season and I'm certain other fans wonder as I do, why these people cannot see the danger of certain players like we do. They are right there! Are they blind? Maybe it's the armchair quarterbacking like we do in sports. We see the tight end was wide open- why didn't the QB see him?! Well, he didn't see him. It's that simple, in football.
Ian could have beaten either Dan or Danielle but, with Dan in the final two he did run the risk of the jury respecting Dan's play over his. With Danielle up against them there was a risk of a sympathy vote for her down-home likableness. But, no one was going to go so far as to pretend to think she played a better game than Ian. I really thought he might have fucked up evicting her.
If not for Danielle's dumb ass *loyalty* vote for Dan, the vote would have been 7-0 for Ian. Good game, good kid. He's been a fan of the show since he was ten and gave Mike "Boogie" a good comeuppance on the show's opening night by throwing that awe-filled fact out there to the old man, former champ. And better, he orchestrated Boogie's eviction. Better still, Boogie respected his play. it's a game...
One beef I have is that both shows are so dependent on their past relying on giving second and third chances to compete, even to past winners. Yeah, it adds some drama to the show. If I were a player though, I'd concentrate on getting rid of experienced players pretty darn quick. Again, I guess it looks easy to those of us playing along at home but- Boogie- telling you what to do? Think maybe he might have an agenda?
Well, Big Brother won't be back until next summer and Survivor is just getting started. I think I'll go take a look at Topix and see who's winning. I'm a former champion there, ya know...
What is it- 14 people start out in a closed set house hoping to spend three months away from loved ones for a chance at half a million dollars? Who does that? They're not all *Type A* personalities that are driven to success. That would be Ultimate Fighting or politics. BB is a blend of those plus cannon fodder. I watched every episode but, on the finale last night, the first few people evicted were kinda foreign to me. Well, it was over two months ago. The show isn't as heavily edited as Survivor is. That show takes place over 32 days real time and has long-since been decided by the time it premieres it's first episode. Both shows are edited and have been accused of staging events, confrontations and conversations for continuity and artistic license. I can live with that as, well, that's showbiz.
I like the group dynamics of both shows. Who steps up? Who steps down to "fly beneath the radar". Survivor tends to be more about leadership and competitions because of that deserted island theme but it, like BB, is heavy on secret alliances and back-stabbing.
Before Topix, I used to equate both shows with work. You'd be shocked at how cutthroat painting is unless you stopped to consider the jerks that you work with. Now you know what I'm talking about. People do the darnedest things at work. Even if there's no immediate financial reward, they try to outwit, outlast, outplay by being duplicitous assholes. Sheesh.
Topix is ultra-duplicitous, filled with false alliances, rumors, innuendo and general skulduggery. It's filled with everything but a season finale. So many people winning but, no closure. No cash either. What is the point? No one knows.
Anyway, It's hard to make it to the final of either show (the TV one's, I mean) without getting a little dirty and a little bloody. AND, you have to answer to the people you very likely dirtied and bloodied. AND they have to decide if you earned the right to the money they had come to win.
Nobody played a more interesting, diabolical game than Dan did. Though he was instantly lauded for his brilliance when he staged his own *funeral*, he lost me when he *turned* on Danielle and brought her to anguished tears. That was cold. We all quickly learned it was a stunt (and *brilliant*) but, it was painful to watch. We didn't want to see her hurt. I'm sure it won him another shot at the game in the near future as the best ever to play the game and, he probably is the best. He's won before. Fuck him. He made the cute, dumb chick cry...a few times...
Ian, the boy genius, was duplicitous himself. He did it without being a Machiavellian jerkface though. To me, that's the game. One goes into it knowing that every other player wants the half-million dollar prize and WILL lie to you to get it. DUH! I'm more offended by someone foolishly believing an obvious liar and then being angry because that person lied to them on a reality show!!!! It's like Louie in Casablanca being shocked- shocked- to find gambling going on. Only it was cute with Louie. It's pathetic without.
My fear last night was that Ian didn't vote out Dan when he had the chance. There had been other chances to get other dangerous contenders this season and I'm certain other fans wonder as I do, why these people cannot see the danger of certain players like we do. They are right there! Are they blind? Maybe it's the armchair quarterbacking like we do in sports. We see the tight end was wide open- why didn't the QB see him?! Well, he didn't see him. It's that simple, in football.
Ian could have beaten either Dan or Danielle but, with Dan in the final two he did run the risk of the jury respecting Dan's play over his. With Danielle up against them there was a risk of a sympathy vote for her down-home likableness. But, no one was going to go so far as to pretend to think she played a better game than Ian. I really thought he might have fucked up evicting her.
If not for Danielle's dumb ass *loyalty* vote for Dan, the vote would have been 7-0 for Ian. Good game, good kid. He's been a fan of the show since he was ten and gave Mike "Boogie" a good comeuppance on the show's opening night by throwing that awe-filled fact out there to the old man, former champ. And better, he orchestrated Boogie's eviction. Better still, Boogie respected his play. it's a game...
One beef I have is that both shows are so dependent on their past relying on giving second and third chances to compete, even to past winners. Yeah, it adds some drama to the show. If I were a player though, I'd concentrate on getting rid of experienced players pretty darn quick. Again, I guess it looks easy to those of us playing along at home but- Boogie- telling you what to do? Think maybe he might have an agenda?
Well, Big Brother won't be back until next summer and Survivor is just getting started. I think I'll go take a look at Topix and see who's winning. I'm a former champion there, ya know...
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